Be positive! · Self-evolving

Let’s support each other

Have you ever told somebody about your goals/dreams/a project you had started working on and heard laughter or some unpleasant response 😞? „You’re not gonna make it!”, „This is just stupid”, „Why would you wanna do that?”.
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Have you ever had a new dream or started working on some new goal and decided to keep it to yourself because you were scared of others’ reaction 🤷🏼‍♀️?
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Have you just stopped telling your close ones about your dreams or your accomplishments because you don’t feel like you have their support and nothing ever impresses them 💔?
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I know I have. I have 1 big project that I’m working on that my family doesn’t know about and 1 secret project that I haven’t told ANYONE about 🤐
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And you know what? This is not how it’s supposed to work 👎.
We should all SUPPORT each other, we should all BELIEVE in others and we should ALWAYS be happy for others’ successes and let them know that they did a good job/congratulate them 👏.
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We REALLY need to learn to be happy for others and to support them. Even if a friend of yours tells you about most obscure, to you 😉, dream, something that he/she wants sooo bad and works hard for it, even if it is totally uninteresting to you and you wouldn’t want a thing like that – support your friend, if it makes her/him happy be happy to her/him 🙏.
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And if you’re not supporting somebody because deep deep down inside you are jealous (come on, admit it 😉) of somebody’s accomplishmets be patient and learn to be happy for others. Your time will come too 🤩. It’s not a race where only 1 gets a reward. If somebody succeeded before you it doesn’t mean that you cannot succeed too! 🎖
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Let’s all help each other, support each other and lets openly talk about our dreams 💬
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So  tell me, what are you dreams? What have you been recently working on?
Whatever it is I BELIEVE IN YOU!! 🤗

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 29

Please read and let me know if it sounds familiar 😉

You’re standing in front of a bakery and you see a yummy cookie 🤤. Your friend brings donuts to work 😍. You feel lilke joining your husband and watch TV instead of working out 📺.
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Your brain demands a reward here and now! 🏆. You forget about your goal and all the reasons why you wanted to achieve it. You succumb to temptation… 😞
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Or maybe…?
With your last remains of strongwill you step away from bakery 🤚, you leave dounts from friend somewhere out of sight 🚫, you leave husband in front of TV and you walk into another room to workout and on your way there you remind yourself that each workout gets you closer to your dream body 💪.
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The ability to postpone pleasures or rewards is called ‘deferring gratification’ in psychology 🧠. It is crucial to realize long-distance goals because it helps you not to succumb to temptation each time but to resist because of you goal that is somewhere in the future 😎.
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Why is it so hard to defer gratification? Because seeing temptation or reward instantly launches more primitive and oldest part of our brain demanding gratification right away 🤯. Luckily we also have prefrontal cortex (part of our brain) that can cool that instant rush and demand down because it is responsible for controlling our impulses 🤚.
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Task for today: think how deferring gratification looks in your case 🤔
In what situations is it easier or more difficult to you? 🤔
What helps you defer gratification? 🧐
What makes deferring gratification hard or impossible to you? 🤨

Next week: Deferring gratification – excercise
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Self-Love

SELF-LOVE: Face scrubs

Homemade Face Scrubs for Every Skin Type 🤩

Ingredients:
– sugar or salt of your choice 🍚
– oil of your choice 🍶
– fruit or vegetable of your choice 🍒🍓🍅🥑
– muddler
– air-tight containers

Instructions:
1. Choose your container, and measure your exfoliant so that the container is 3/4 full.
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2. Measure out your oil. You’ll want a 2-to-1 ratio. So, twice as much salt or sugar as oil.
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3. Combine oil and salt or sugar in a bowl, and stir until just combined.
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4. Add in the fruit or vegetable chopped as finely as you can get it, and muddle the mixture together until just combined. You don’t want to mix it too much or the granules will start to dissolve.
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5. Decant into your storage container and store in the refrigerator for up to 2 weeks.
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Will you try it out?

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 28

How do you relax? 😉
Today’s last part of „Be good to yourself” series.
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Do you remember when we talked about factors that weaken your strong will? 🤔 It was stress and tiredness and lately we’ve been talking a lot about the danger of treating yourself badly and punishing (and getting into a trap of „everything or nothing” thinking” ⚠️).
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That’s why sometimes in order to rebuild and strengthen strong will you need rest, regeneration and pleasures that will give you energy and motivation to work 🤗.
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Task for today: Make a list of your ways of relax and pleasures. It is important so that they wouldn’t be contradictory to your goal (so e.g. don’t write on your list „eating huge pizza” or „eating chocolate cookies”  when your goal is to eat healthy 😉).
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It might be an evening with a good book 📖 or a movie 🎬, talk or meeting with a friend 💬, relaxing bath 🛀, walk around the neighbourhood 🏞, playing with dog 🐶, relaxing yoga session etc. 🧘🏼‍♀️
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So what are your ways to relax? Tell me! 😊

Next week: Sometimes it’s better to postpone
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Self-Love

SELF-LOVE: Oatmeal Foot Scrub

You will Need:
2 tablespoons bath salt
2 teaspoons oatmeal
1 teaspoon baking soda
2-3 tablespoons water 💧

Method
Mix all the ingredients in a bowl and make a paste.
Apply the paste to your feet and scrub for 10 minutes 😁
Wash and follow it up with a moisturizer 😍

How It Works
Oatmeal has a coarse texture, which makes it a great exfoliator. It also softens the skin on your feet and soothes minor rashes and itches. Combining it with bath salt and baking soda enhances its exfoliating effect 🤗

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 27

What’s the difference between punishment and self-discipline? 🤔 Perhaps you’ve already asked yourself that on our last step about punishing yourself. How to distinguish it? 🧐
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You don’t want to be too strict but on the other hand you need self-discipline so as not to spend the rest of your life living lazily and letting everything go and not reaching any goals 😉.
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Do you know that the word „discipline” means in latin knowledge, giving orders, teaching? 👨🏻‍🎓 As you see it has nothing to do with punishment, right? 😊
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Authors of many books about discipline emphasize that it comes from constant attempts. You fail, you get up wiser and move on 💪. Self-discipline is an effect of your effort and not giving up on next attempts.
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While main task of the punishment is to scare, it only teaches us what to avoid, brings tension, and often, fear and anger 🤢.
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I hope that you see now the difference and as to be good to yourself you’ll start liking self-discipline and avoid punishing 🤗
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How to distinguish them in practice? Common ground of those two often is the will to avoid some activity. Sometimes we need to force ourselves to do something that is beneficial to us (e.g. working out).
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How can we know if our forcing is a part of self-discipline or punishment? 🤔
If you’re not sure think of a situation when you really don’t feel like doing something and answer couple questions:
*Sitation:
*What do you feel then? 🤔
*Is my body tense or loose? Do I clutch my jaw, feel tension in my arms? 😓
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If you feel a lot of tension, anger or fear and negative thoughts about yourself pop into your head it is probably closer to punishment than to self-discipline. You’ll recognize self-discipline when you’ll  be easily able to say why activity that you’re trying to force yourself to is good and beneficial to you 🤗

Nexy week: Learn to rest
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Self-evolving

How to easily change your mindset

Stop thinking „I have to” and start thinking „I can”. 💪
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This is the easiest and most effective way to find what you should be grateful for 🤗
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Instead of thinking „Damn, I have to go to work tomorrow 🙄” think „I can work! I didn’t lose job during coronavirus shutdown and I can keep on earning money 💪!”.
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Instead of thinking „I have to make dinner, I so don’t feel like it 🙄” think „I can make dinner! I have all the ingredients in the fridge and I don’t have to walk around being hungry, I am so lucky 😋!”
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Instead of thinking „I have to ride 300km to see my Mom, it’s so far away 🙄” think „I can still catch a train and go see her, not everyone is so lucky as so many people already lost their moms ❤”.
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It’s not only about finding the reasons why you should be grateful but once you start thinking like that, once you start seeing your life as a list of opportunities and not tasks that you HAVE TO do you’ll feel more willing to do them! 😉
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Words „have to” bring this pressure and tension, when you hear someone saying „you have to do this” you don’t feel like doing it at all 🤷🏼‍♀️, it works another way round.
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„I can” attitude will make you feel more willing to actually do those things, you won’t feel that pressure and you’ll do those tasks with a smile on your face! 😊
Try it out!