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Come back next Monday for more!
Tell me, when you look at yourself in the mirror do you see your advantages or your flaws first? 🤔
Don’t worry, we tend to listen to our inner critic and to focus on negativities, that’s normal because we inherited from our earliest evolutionary survival needs. But we can work on that and turn it into self-compassion! 🤗
Kristin Neff, PhD, the world’s leading researcher of self-compassion, identifies 3 elements of self-compassion:
➡️ 1. Mindful awareness 🧐
Noticing the inner critic is the first step so if are aware of it and you see it as something negative and unfavourable to you, you’re on the good path to eliminate it 😊! Go easy and always be kind to yourself so if you notice that negative voice now and that you’ve been bad to yourself – don’t freak out! 😉 Don’t get angry with yourself for being angry with yourself 😜, don’t judge and don’t blame yourself. Just go slow, close that chapter and work on that change.
➡️ 2. Practice kindness🙏
Talk to yourself as if you were talking to a friend (after all, you are your friend! ☺).
At The Center for Compassionate Leadership one of favorite practices to strengthen your self-kindness is called “Note to a Dear Friend” ✉ Whenever you face a problem practice this:
„Write a note as if you were comforting a loved one or a dear friend who was facing the same difficult situation you. Add two words to the top of the note: “Dear [your name].” Read the note out loud to yourself with loving kindness.”
Read more here: https://www.centerforcompassionateleadership.org/blog/compassionate-leadership-practice-series-note-to-a-dear-friend-a-self-compassion-exercise
➡️ 3. Recognize That You Aren’t Alone 😘
It is very important to remember that you’re not alone in all this! We all have inner critics we fight with! Everyone faces challenges and makes mistakes. Everyone has bad days 🤗
Self-compassion is a skill that gets better and better the more you practice it. So start small and keep moving forward!
They say procrastination is the thief of time—actually deadlines are 😬.
New research from the University of Otago has found that if it is best not to set a deadline at all 😮. But if you do set a deadline, make it short 😉 (here we’re talking about a deadline of a short/small project or a deadline of STARTING some big project).
Professor Stephen Knowles, from the Otago Business School tested the effect of deadline length on task completion 🧐.
Participants were invited to complete an online survey in which a donation goes to charity. They were given either one week, one month, or no deadline to respond.
The study found responses to the survey were lowest for the one-month deadline, and highest when no deadline was specified 🙃.
No deadline and the one-week deadline led to many early responses, while a long deadline appeared to give people permission to procrastinate, and then forget 🤷♀️.
Quite surprising, huh? Remember about that when planning some new project! 😉
It is also said that if something is said to take 5-10min of your time, do it straigh away. Don’t postpone it over and over again. For example, if you need to call your bank to ask for something or you need to buy something online – just go and do it! Procrastinating is the worst 🙄.
And that’s the end of our Monday Motivation series! 🤗 Whenever you feel like you lack motivation go back to those steps:
➡️Remind yourself what motivation exactly is (step 1)
➡️ Why you may lack it (step 2)
➡️ Read again how to set a goal (step 3)
➡️ Successful methods to boost your motivation:
🔸️ visualisations (step 7)
🔸️ training your willpower (step 8 & 9)
🔸️ deferring gratification (steps 11 & 12)
➡️ Remember what may weaken your motivation (steps 10, 14 & 15)
➡️ For practical tips to use in life (not only learning about motivation in theory) keep coming back to steps 18 and 19 – those are my ‘secret weapons’ how to get yourself to work! 😉
Happy planning your projects for this year and I wish you plenty of motivation and will to work!
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Come back next Monday for more!
What is really self-love/self-care? 🤔
People use to think that self-care is just taking care of our body (and I may have pushed that thinking by sharing recipes for homemade cosmetics as self-love series and not talking about other ways of self-caring 😬).
Self-care is not only taking care of your body and/or skincare. Self-care is also taking care…of our mind! Of our soul, of our self-cofindence, of feeling present, feeling important & needed.
For me, self-love is putting yourself first! 😎
Self-love is standing up to somebody who expects something from you that you don’t want and saying ‘no’ 🚫
Self-love is putting your needs first and not going to a party with your friends simply because you feel like staying home and having some me-time 💅.
Self-love is suddenly taking a day off because you don’t feel well 🤧 even though your boss and/or co-workers count on you (which I did yesterday 😉).
Self-love is not only putting your needs first but also feeling good about doing it! You’re doing it for yourself, you’re taking care of yourself, of your mental health, be proud! 😊
So, do you practice other forms of self-care rather than just taking care of your body? Can you give an example of a situation when you put your needs first? 😊
➡️ 1. Plan 📋 what you need to do exactly (e.g. step by step) the day/night before and lay out everything you’re gonna need.
➡️ 2. Remember why you want to do it – envision the success if you do it and feel the regret if you don’t 😎.
Quick visualisation of yourself at the end of that path (whatever it is that you’re working on either being thin if you’re trying to lose weight or being rich and successful if you’re e.g. starting your own business) always boosts motivation and will make you wanna get to work!😀
➡️ 3. Stop thinking, just do it! 😉
Simple as that! Stop wondering „what if I can’t make it?” 🤔 or „maybe today isn’t the best day to do it?”🤔. Just do it! Remember, doing something is still better than doing nothing!
➡️ 4. Act as if you were motivated 🙃
You may be able to trick yourself into feeling motivated by changing your behavior. Instead of sitting on a couch in your pjs get dressed and start moving 🚶♀️! This always gets me going!
If it doesn’t work on you take it step further – put on a jacket/coat and go for a walk 🌳, use it to get creative, to get inspired and then when you get back home go straight to work, don’t sit down on a couch even for a second! 😉
➡️ 5. Always reward yourself for hard work! 🏆
It can be as simple as metaphorical (or literal if you want) patting yourself on a back, saying/thinking that you’re proud of yourself that you did the work (even if it was just a little bit) and do something fun afterwards – make yourself a tea ☕ and watch your favourite movie 🎬 or another episode of some TV show, go meet your friends etc 🤗
But remember to balance it well 😉– don’t reward yourself with a marathon of movies or 3 days off after working for 1-2h 🤭. Make sure that the „reward time” is proportional to the time you spent working.
Those are all the steps that work on me and that get me going! 😃
Do you like them? Will you try them out to get to work when you don’t feel like it?
Let me know if it works on you! 😊👇
New year is always a great moment to re-create yourself, to pursue your goals, to learn new things and plenty more! 🤗
I have plenty goals, plenty ideas and plenty resolutions for this year.
What about you? Do you want to change something in yourself this year? Do you want to learn something new? 😃
My resolutions/plans for 2022:
🔸️ get back to regular working outs and lose weight 😏
🔸️ write my 2nd novel 📝
🔸️ read more 📖
🔸️ keep working on my Spanish 🇪🇸
🔸️ develop my Photoship skills 😎
🔸️ visit some new country 🌍
🔸️ finally visit my lovely London ❤
🔸️ do more puzzles/crosswords
🔸️ do some course, e.g. in pastry 🧁
🔸️ keep building my Smiley Society 😊🤗
What about you?
What are your plans for 2022? 😃
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Come back next Monday for more!
We’ve already went through theoretical part of our Motivational Monday series 📝. We’ve learned what exactly motivation is, what may be a reason of lack of it, how motivation works with different emotions, how to set a precise plan of action etc. Now it’s time to learn useful practical tricks that you may use when you don’t feel like working and you want to boost your motivation (and it’s so needed for our new year’s resolutions, right? 🤩)
3 quick tricks you may do to boost your motivation 💪:
➡️ 1. Argue the Opposite 🔛
Often when we don’t feel like working we come up with plenty excuses 🙄. So to any excuse your mind will give you like „I won’t succeed anyway” quickly think „But what if I do? Plenty people succeed so can I!” 😃; instead of „It’s too dificult, I won’t make it” think „It may be difficult at first but I’ll learn how to do it and it will get easier with time!”. 😎
Arguing the opposite can help you see both ends of the spectrum. It can also remind you that an overly pessimistic outcome isn’t completely accurate.
➡️ 2. Use the 10-Minute Rule ⏰ – this is what works best for me 😄
Give yourself permission to quit a task after 10 minutes. When you reach the 10-minute mark, ask yourself if you want to keep going or quit 🤔. You’ll likely find that you have enough motivation to keep going. So in the end you don’t have to push yourself to work for 6-8h or how long but you just need to push yourself for those 10min and the rest will go with the flow 😉.
➡️ 3. Pair a Dreaded Task With Something You Enjoy 🎶
Boost your mood by adding a little fun to something you’re not motivated to do 😃
Here are some examples:
🔸️ Listen to music while you run.
🔸️ Call a friend, and talk while you’re cleaning the house.
🔸️ Light a scented candle while you’re working on your computer.
Which one do you think would work best on you? 🤔
Those are just a few. Come back next Monday for more! 🤩
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Come back next Monday for more!