Bez kategorii · Self-evolving

Communication

Do you know what’s key to good relationship?
Communication 😉
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And it’s not only about love relationships, it’s important to make any kind of relationship work – a friendship, a relation you have with your daughter, mom, neighbour, coworker. Anybody.
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We are ALL different. And nobody sits in your head, nobody reads your mind, believe me 😉. So when you don’t like something, when you need help with something you need to COMMUNICATE.
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Plenty woman (I used to be one of them) think that if they send „signals” to their partner he’ll know what she needs/means 😅 That if she says something between the lines about a movie she’d like to watch or talk about her friend’s new cosmetics he’ll instantly get the idea to take you to cinema to see that movie and he’ll buy those cosmetics for you 😅 No, this doesn’t work with men.
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Men and women work totally differently and so do our minds! You need to be loud and clear 😉
COMMUNICATE.
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It works like that with everybody. If you’re angry with your boss because he/she gives you so much work tell him/her politely (!) that you’re swamped and ask if he/she can maybe get one of your co-workers to help you, to divide some big task between 2-3 people, not just 1 🤷🏼‍♀️
TALK.
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If you’re frustrated with your friend because he keeps inviting you to places you don’t like or wants to do something you’re not fan of – tell him. He simply might not know that you don’t like it! I’m sure he doesn’t do it to make you angry, he’s just anaware of your negative feelings. Why? Because you’ve never told him that you e.g. don’t like bowling or eating at that Thai restaurant. 😉
LET HIM KNOW.
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We all need to talk more. Say what we think out loud. Don’t keep your thought or feelings to yourself. But remember, if it’s something negative think how to communicate it to your friend to not hurt his feelings 🙏. We should always be sincere and if you don’t like something you should say it but do it gently.

📸 pic taken in Zakhyntos in 2017

Self-evolving · Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 16

I’ve got good news for you – willpower can be trained! 💪 It is often treated like something you either have or don’t but psychology researches show that you can train your strong will just like your muscles. And nobody was born with a 6-pack, right? 😉
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It is great news because those who aren’t scrupulous naturally can train it 💪. You’ve actually already started it with implementation intention (step 10) and by process visualisation (step 11) 😉
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Since willpower works like a muscle it has limited source of energy and strength. There are things that empower it 👍 but there are also things that weaken it 👎.
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Your goal is to get to know and, if possible, remove your obstacles to having strong will 😎. Those most basic ones are stress, tiredness and lack of sleep. It seems so simple, right? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Yet you do not always see the connection between those factors and your willpower.
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Task for today: Observe and write down (or analyze past experiences if you’re calm and rested today) how stress and tiredness have impact on your willpower:
* What situations are those?
* What happens then?
* How do you react?
* Is it harder for you to stick to your goal?
* Do you have any ways to help yourself and not to be tempted (turn your „I don’t want to” power on) or to do something that you don’t feel like doing (turn your „I want to” power)? Next week: Stress vs willpower (next week Smiley Future will be on Wednesday!)

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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Self-criticism

Are you often criticizing yourself? 🤔 Always unhappy with your accomplishments? Furious about failures? 🙄
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First of all you need to lower your expectations ⚠️. We all tend to challenge ourselves more than others, which is good in a way but you need to know the limit.
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When you fail to do something or do something wrong and you start pulling your hair and are furious think if you’d react same way if your friend had done it 😉
Would you shout at him/her, feel being let down etc? Or you’d pat them on a shoulder, smile and say „That’s ok, you’ll do it tomorrow” or „That’s fine, you’ll do it right next time”? 😊
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You should say same thing to yourself. If it wouldn’t be a big deal for another person it shouldn’t be a big deal if you’d done it. Treat yourself right. ⚠️
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Second of all, we tend to focus only/mainly on failures and stop seeing what we’ve accomplished 🤷🏼‍♀️. We get angry with ourselves for not doing something and we forget about all the other things we’ve managed to do. For example, you get mad because you haven’t wokred out and you ate something unhealthy and suddenly forgot that you’ve managed to workout and eat healthy other 6 days of the week.
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It’s ok to have one bad day and you shouldn’t feel bad about it. Focus on other 6 good days 😉
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If you feel like you’re criticizing yourself too much and you’re never happy with your work try writing down every evening 2-3 things you’ve managed to do that day ✒📄.
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But remember! If you’ve tried to do something and failed that should still go on the list! 😉 It means you TRIED and that’s the most important thing. Most people don’t even get to that step 😉

📸 pic taken in Dominican Republic in 2018

Be positive! · Self-evolving

New normal

What if it is all a test? 🤔
To see whether you got your prorities set right? To see what you’re sad about when having to cancel all plans? To see if you can appreciate what you got? To see if you’re flexible making new plans, rearranging your schedules, building new paths, being creative? 🤔
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We can learn so much these days ⚠️ Not only about the world but about ourselves too 😉, about your closes ones whether think about you too these days, about your friends if they really care for you 😘
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Have you learned something new about yourself? I, for example, started to notice that I really answer to problems/anxiety with work 💪. I put more and more on myself trying to achieve as much as I can, to prove that I’m good enough, to make myself proud, to feel calm once something is complete. This is they way I cope with stress – I work even more. That’s just me but I’ll work on that 😉😅
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This is the time to observe, take notes and draw conclusions 📝 This is the time to learn ⚠️. So that once it’s all over we can build new ‘normal’ with the notes we took. We can use our lessons, our mistakes to set new goals, build new paths ⚠️
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And I’m not talking about you and me only. I’m talking about all of us as one Earth-society 🌍. We should all keep some of the actions we do now forever. Starting from taking more care abour our health and appreciating when we’re healthy 🙏, from paying more attention to hygiene and washing our hands as often as we can 👏, from keeping healthy distance from one another in a shop, not standing on somebody’s toes 😅, let’s keep this personal space 😉, to helping one another 🤝, to spreading good deeds, to caring about strangers, not only about ourselves! 🙏
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We can build such a beautiful new world out of it with new, better priorities, better standards and better rules. 🤩
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A world where we can all appreciate what we got, care about others and are willing to help a stranger. 🙏
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This is the time to build a new reality. ⚠️
Who’s with me? 😉 📸 pic taken in Athens in 2015

Self-evolving · Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 5

Let’s get back to our circle of life.
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Today time to think about hobbies and to sum up whole circle. After that it will be easier for you to set a challenge and design your tomorrow 💪
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Last section that we need to analize is widely understood personal development. It is our passions, hobbies and interests, basically everything you like doing and that makes you feel creative 🤩
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As usual – mark on your circle of life how happy you are about your personal development/hobbies in a scale from 1 to 10.
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Here are the questions that will help you mark that subject:
* Do you think this part needs change? If yes, what would have to change? Maybe there is something that you want for a long time, something you miss yet you kept putting it off?
* What will you gain by those changes?
* What will happen if you don’t change anything about your personal development?
* In what way does personal development have an impact on other aspects of your life now?
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Bonus: in the cirlce of life I made for you you’ll find an empty spot for a section that is important to you and that we haven’t talked about here. I, personally, put „Confidence” there. :::
Do you have your whole circle of life ready? Remember, the circle is for your eyes only, you don’t have to show it to anybody.
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Now that you have whole circle ready it is time to analyze it as a whole. This circle will help you find segment that needs change most and – what comes after – your goal. Changing one, crucial segment might bring changes into others ones.
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Look at your circle and answer those questions:
* What is  the most important in life to you? How do those values take place next to the circle? Do they combine?
* Which segment has most impact on other segments?
* Which segment do you want to work on 1st?
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Next week : Setting your goal

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”


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Self-evolving

Time

Remember – time is not our friend. It won’t wait for you to be ready and you’ll never know when you’re gonna run out of it ⚠️
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Don’t put your dreams on hold, don’t put taking care of your health on hold and most important – don’t put building your relationships on hold 🚫
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Sadly we never know when last day of our lives will come. Same with your family and/or friends. Enjoy and cherish them while you can 🙏, believe me, you’ll miss them when they’re gone and it will be too late then.
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Give your mom a kiss 😘
Tell your significant other you love him/her 💑
Call your grandma ☎️
Take your friend out for a coffee/drink 🍻
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Don’t wait. Stop saying you don’t have time 🤷🏼‍♀️ It’s about those who make time!
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Do it all while you still can.
Maybe it is worth setting one day of a week as a day for relations? E.g. Sunday? Just keep it always open and without any other plans but to spend it with your close ones 🤗
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It’s not only about the relations though. Don’t pospone taking care of yourself too. Stop saying „I’ll do it one day” . Just do it now! 💪
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You can plan your future and time/life will surprise you anyway 🤷🏼‍♀️. You can’t predict everything. You may think that it’s not a good moment now, that you’re not in a good situation but what if next month or next year will be worse (knocking on the wood that it won’t be for any of us! 😘)? And you’ll think then that you could’ve started earlier.
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We always regret things we didn’t do, opportunities we didn’t take, people we let go. Try to prevent it. ⚠️ Seize the day, seize the time you got, seize your life 🙏
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We got corona virus epidemic around the world. Are you scared? Do you panic? I think we should just live and enjoy the time we got 🙏
Stop waiting, start doing 💪

Health · Self-evolving

5 ways to fight stress

Are you aware how big impact does stress have on your health both mental and physical? 😳
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Too much stress not only will obviously make your mood worse and make you powerless but in the long run it can affect your immune system, the state of your hair and skin, your digestive system and plenty more 🤯
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It will make you unhappy, less willing to work or follow your dreams. Not to sound too scary but it will make you miserable 😫
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So here’s 5 ways to fight stress. Whenever you feel stressed do one of those:
1. Workout 💪 – physical exhaustion will not only bring down your mental exhaustion and/or chaos in your head but after a good workout your organism will start producing endorphynes – hormones of happiness so you’ll feel much better 💪😊
2. Take a walk 🚶‍♂️– as I said in my yesterday’s psychological fact – brain secretes certain chemicals when you have trees and plants around you which boosts the brain thinking 🌳🌴🌲. This is a great way to deal with a stressful situation, just walk and think, find a solution
3. Write it down 📝– it is also scientifically proven that taking your thoughts „out of your brain” and writing them down makes you feel calmer, makes you  see the problem/stressful situation more clearly and it is easier to think of a solution 🧐
4. Clean 💧– another thing scientificcally proven that when you clean your apartment or take your trash out your brain does „self-cleanse” too and gets rid of the bad thoughts/emotions, puts your thoughts in the order and gets rid of the chaos inside your head, something like placing everything in its spot on a cupboard 😉
5. Take a nap 🛌 – sleep makes everything better. You rest both pchysically and mentally and you’ll be waking up with fresh mind ready to face the stressful situation 🤗