Be positive! · Self-evolving

Stop & rest

Do you know when to stop & relax?
Are you setting yourself goals that you NEED TO do before taking some time off?
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You need to know when to stop.⚠️
There will always be something to do but you need to learn to put it aside undone and have some time for yourself. You won’t work well without rest anyway!
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It was hard for me, some time ago, to stop working and start chilling when I didn’t finish what I was doing. I kept going and going until it was done.
Today I set myself times when I start relax time and when it comes I just leave work and go rest. For example, I work till 9pm at my music agency or blog stuff (or doing chores at home or anything else) and whatever I manage to do till that time will be done and the rest I’ll do the next day. The world won’t end if I do the laundry the next day or send some emails the following morning. 🤷🏼‍♀️
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You need to proritise your relax time too. Don’t push it further and further. Just put work/chores/anything else aside and chill. You’ll get back to that tomorrow.
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BUT
It’s not only about small one-day activities. We keep setting new goals one after another after another. We succeeded in one thing, we got to our finish line and we want more and more and we keep pushing our finish line further and further instead of appreciating what we’ve achieved in the 1st place.🤷🏼‍♀️
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Don’t run forward. Stop and rest from time to time. Celebrate your successes, enjoy what you achieved, have some rest and then set new goals.😘 —
Last photo from Italy!
Swipe left for our short video from that trip 😊

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Judging

Why do we keep judging people without even knowing them?

People tend to make an opinion about others based on their looks, their behaviour or anything else.

Isn’t there a posibility that they may be original and not fit some stupid stereotype? Are really all people the same? No, they’re not and we all need to remember about that. We are all unique and that’s what makes us, as society, interesting.

Some people tend to be prejudiced to others because of their looks, their social status or anything else. They see a person for a second and they already have an opinion about him/her. They already label them and put them in a sack with other people in the group. I already talked about stereotypes here some time ago but today I want to talk to you about something similar, yet different.

Have you ever heard „Look at her, she’s so young yet she wears Gucci, has Michael Kors bag and Chanel sungless. She must be with an old rich man or has a rich dad” or „Have you seen what he’s driving? He can’t be THAT rich! He’s probably stealing or does scams”.

Have you? Cause I’ve heard it many times and that’s enough. Why can’t a young girl be successful and earn good money to be able to buy expensive clothes and  accessories? There are plenty young successful woman who are rich and don’t need a man to support them financially.

Why can’t a guy have a good car and not be a scammer? Is it impossible to get rich on hard honest work? Of course it’s not!

Does a girl who is successful here on ig have be a cheater? Maybe she just works hard on it, takes great photo, is very charismatic and had a bit of luck too? Do people who have wealthy parents and have been travelling since being a kid have to have an easy life? Money doesn’t give you everything so perhaps they can have a difficult life on another lever.

Some of us are less successful and some are more, even being in the same age. We all have different stories and we shouldn’t make bad assumptions about people who have more or who go a different path.

Unless you know somebody’s whole story please don’t judge people and spread bad things about them. If that was you, if you were successful and got rich would you like people to say that you probably stole money from someone?

Please treat people you’d like to be treated.

Talk about them the way you’d like to be talked about.

Lets all have respect towards one another and just STOP JUDGING.

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Being cool

What does being ‘cool’ mean to you?
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It is always a big problem in high schools, while growing up. You HAVE TO be cool or you’ll be pushed away. I had a problem with that when I was a teenager. Always trying to be cool, to hang out with cool kids. To be popular. Does it ring a bell? 🤷🏼‍♀️
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I find it disturbing and unhealthy that young people are trying so hard to fit in nowadays. That they have to act cool, wear expensive clothes and attend all parties to be cool or they’ll be bullied if they don’t.
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What’s up with that?! Who defines what it means to be cool? Show me a definition of the word „cool”.
Those are some stupid rules defined by bullies and popular kids that make other, weaker kids copy them, adore them and do anything what they say. This is not right! ⚠️
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But I feel like it’s not only among teenagers. There is still this unhealthy rivalry among adults too. We all need to attend important events and can’t miss big parties, we need to wear PRADA, Gucci or another expensive brand, we all drink expensive wines and talk about our expensive cars.
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Does it have to be this way? Is it being cool to be rich? Seems like it these days. We are all trying to impress others with what we have, what we wear and what we drive. For me those are least important values. I don’t have a car, I don’t have any fancy wardrobe and I would never spend whole salary on an expensive bag or Jimmy Choo shoes. If others do want it all that is perfectly fine but should they judge others through the perspecive of owning those things? Is somebody worse if she doesn’t have Dolce Gabbana bag? Or maybe she simply doesn’t need it, doesn’t want it? Does it make her not cool? 😐
For me cool is being your true self and not pretending to be someone else just to impress others. 😎
This is cool – just being you.
You are cool. 😘

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Life motto

Do you know what is my life motto now? A motto that changed my mindset and my attitude towards life completely?
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„Don’t worry – change what you can and accept what you can’t”.
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Seems so simple yet so many people forget about that.
If you can change your situation then do it! Work on it and make the difference!
But if there’s something that you are not happy about but you can’t change it then just accept it.
For example, if you’re unhappy that you’re too fat this is something you can change! Go on a diet, start working out and you’ll lose weight.
But if you’re unhappy that you’re too short then it’s something that you can’t change and you need to accept it.
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I know it sounds easy but you just have to! You won’t do anything about and why spend the rest of your life constantly worrying about it?
😉😉😉

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Controlling

You can’t control everything in your life & you can’t predict everything. And you shouldn’t!

We want to have everything organised, planned, to be prepared for everything but life is full of surprises! The more you’ll want to be prepared for everything the less you will be ready for surprises.🤷🏼‍♀️

It is good to plan things ahead but you need to also be prepared for surprises. You can write down what can go wrong, this way you’ll be a bit prepared and you won’t be that surprised. But what is really important is to look for an alternative solutions once something unexpected comes up. .
Another thing is to get loose a bit from time to time. 🤪 Don’t plan every moment of your life. Let yourself be a bit spontaneous! We tend to be 1 day ahead in our heads. We keep thinking what we have to do tomorrow instead of just being here & now. ☺

It’s good to plan your future but be present in the present moment too. Just as the word ‘present’ tells you to. 🤗
It’s good to be spontaneous and live in the moment but you need to organize your plans and future too.
You need to find that balance in all this. ⚖

I plan my time between Monday and Friday afternoon (with evenings included as I do lots of work after my full-time job) but I never plan some serious „to do” stuff for weekends or days off. This is the time to relax and to be spontaneous. Is it sunny? Lets go on a long walk!
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BUT!
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If some things come up during my planned time I don’t close up on other options. If I have e.g Tuesday evening planned because I need to work on my book, blog, music agency or anything else but I get a call from a friend that he’s in town I change my plans. You need to be FLEXIBLE. Just ask yourself „Will something happen if I don’t do it today?”. After all I see my friend once a year. I can do my work tomorrow.
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BUT!
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Don’t overuse it. Don’t keep postponing your plans. „I’ll do it tomorrow, today I don’t feel like it”. You may never have the energy to do some work. Just push yourself 😊

You need to be flexible. To be both organised but ready for surprises and spontaneity at the same time.

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Leave your comfort zone

In order to grow your need to leave your comfort zone.
In order to achieve great things you need to leave your comfort zone.
In order to change your life you need to leave your comfort zone.

Success doesn’t happen by doing ordinary, easy things. You need to push yourself further to get what you want. You need to overcome your weaknesses to grow. 💪Think of it as going to the gym – you need to feel pain and feel uncomfortable for the workout to work. You don’t burn calories without losing your breath and you don’t build muscles without getting tired. This is this barier you need to overcome to get results. That barier is your comfort zone.💥

The same rule is when it comes to work, following dreams or anything else. You need to constantly leave your comfort zone. If something is too easy it means you’re doing something wrong. There NEED TO BE DIFFICULTIES. And you need to overcome them.📈

For example, if you want to be a successful businessman but you are shy, you don’t like talking to and meeting strangers – you need to overcome it.

If you ask musician or an actor if he/she is scared before going onto the stage most of them will tell you they are. No matter how many years they’ve been doing it. They overcome their stress, their anxiety and/or stagefreight every evening.🎙

There are plenty people who are stuck at work doing what they hate but they don’t look for a new job because they’ve been working there so many years that they can just keep doing it. The truth is they are stuck in their comfort zone. They are scared of changes, of new challenges, of meeting new people and starting from the beginning so they stay where they are. That is not right. You need to overcome this fear of changes, you need to overcome your weaknesses, you need to leave your comfort zone, go out and do what you want!

Everybody wants to be at home, in PJs not stressing about anything whole day. But this is not the way to achieve great things.

You need to grow to achieve success but you won’t grow without leaving comfort zone.

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Little things

We’ve learned about gratitude (see my previous post) now it’s time to learn to notice those little things/aspects we need to be grateful for. 👀
In my yesterday’s post I wrote about being grateful and noticing big aspects like being healthy, having family or not being blind but today I want you to learn how to be happy about the little things. This is another KEY TO HAPPINESS. ⚠️⚠️⚠️ Good stuff won’t happen to you everyday, let’s face it. But in order to be happy everyday you need to smile at the little things. 😊 Like the color of the sky, good weather or delicious food 😋. If you think about it, good things DO happen to you everyday, you just need to look for them sometimes. 😁
Look around you, stop for a moment and look at other people. Have a look at colors of your surrounding. Appreciate small gestures from other people like a waiter taking care of you and being friendly in a restaurant or a doctor that wants to help you and take care of your comfort ❤. Look at the street you pass everyday, notice its buildings and their details. We tend to be in rush all the time and doing many things automatically. Stop.⚠️ You need to be present in a moment to appreciate here and now.⚠️
Focus on the things you’re doing. Stop doing everything automatically. Your mind is off then and it doesn’t appreciate the things that are happening. Before you start eating your meal stop and appreciate its colors, its smell. 👃
Just slow down and try to be present.❤
This is called MINDFULLNESS. There are many excercises to develop it so you appreciate some situations or moments more and do less things automatically.
One of the excercises is eating a raisin – perfect for beginners. Act like you’ve never eaten or seen a raisin before. Notice the way the raisin looks, how it feels, its smell or taste. Then slowly eat it but focus on it.👅
If you want to excercise it and learn to be present here and now hence appreciate your life more see this article – https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/mindfulness-exercises-techniques-activities/