I have started new (and probably biggest yet) challenge on my Instagram! 🤩 It’s about following dreams! I’m one of those people who always encourage you to dream big and follow those dreams! I’ll be always rooting for you to work hard on reaching your goal 💪.
Setting goals and dreaming big is amazing and I am all for it but you need to learn to be happy during the process of following dreams, to be happy on your path, not only at the finish line ☺️.
You can’t get stuck on „I’ll be happy when…” syndrome.
➡️ „I’ll be happy when I finally manage to get a new job and quit current one.”
➡️ „I’ll be happy when I finally move to a bigger house.”
➡️ „I’ll be happy when I succeed and when my company gets 1000 clients.”
Do you see what’s wrong with those sentences? You’re blocking your own happiness! 😔 Thinking that you’ll be happy when you succeed you subconsciously tell yourself to be unhappy now 😬. What if it takes several years for you to achieve your goal? And what if it doesn’t work out and you won’t reach that particular goal (sometimes it just doesn’t happen, sometimes you miss your opportunity, run out of time etc)? Will you never be happy then? 😔
Appreciate all the steps inbetween! There’s so many more steps to be happy about rather than just the final one 🏁. E.g. if your goal is to get 1000 clients you still get a milestone when you get the 1st one! 🤩 That’s a huge thing to celebrate! Somebody liked and bought your product/service! And when you get to 100 clients – woah, that’s a lot of people, you should be happy! 🤗 If your goal is to lose 15kg you should be happy about every single kilogram lots, you should be happy about yourself taking care of yourself, you should be happy now! 😊
Remember, when setting your goal and following your dreams, make sure you’re happy all the way through the process!
I keep telling you – whatever your dream is, keep taking small steps forward! With small steps you won’t get tired and/or burned out which means you won’t give up and you’ll reach that goal! 🤩
If you’re one of those people who need to do a lot to ‘feel like’ you’ve actually worked (gotta admit that I’m one of those people 😅) and that e.g. reading 15 pages a day is nothing to you, saving 5 USD a day doesn’t feel like saving and/or when you work 30min daily on your project you don’t feel like working at all remember:
🔸️15 pages a day (so about 30min per day spent reading) is 5475 pages per year so about 13-18 books per year – that’s quite a lot! Definitely more than the average 😉
🔸️ 5 USD saved daily will make 1825 USD in a year! 💰💰💰
You can buy quite a lot with those money!
🔸️ 30 min per day spent working on your project/business makes 10950 min in a year = 182.5 h !!! You can do/achieve so much in 182 hours!!! 😉
Remember – small steps matter and can make a HUUUUGE difference!
I love reading inspirational stories/bios of successful people 🤩. I love getting to know how they got to the place where they are. And I often read that some of those who succeeded and are millionaires today💰 had to sacrifice it all to get there 😔. That they had to put their work first, that they worked 16-18h a day/ 7 days a week. That they put family and friends aside to work work work 😌.
I am ALL about following dreams, working hard etc 🤗. I think you know me that well already and you know that I work a lot 😉. I’ve always had some ‘extra projects’ (having some extra jobs, being a coordinator in a students volunteer society 👩🎓, having a music agency and booking gigs for 5 bands 🎶, writing and publishing a book 📖, now this blog…) since I turned 16. I never was this kind of person who comes back from school/work and just chills 🤷♀️.
I could never pay such price as putting my family aside or putting health over work/my projects 🤷♀️.
Maybe that’s why I’m not as successful as others 😬 but I prefer to have a long and healthy life full of laughs and love ❤ instead of just working till I hit a burnout 🙄.
That’s why I stepped aside a bit in January. As you may know I didn’t feel good most of the time and didn’t want to do something ‘because I HAVE TO’. I just waited for my energy to come back to me.
The choice whether you choose work over all or you choose a bit slower life is yours but make sure that it is good for you 😘
Try to think why you lack motivation 🤔 Maybe you’re too tired and need rest? Or maybe you don’t have a precise plan? 🧐 Or maybe you’re trapped in one of the mind traps : „everything or nothing” thinking, excessive pessimism or exaggeration 🤯
If you are, create a list of counter-arguments that will help you look at reality without falling into those mind traps 🤗
Come back to the source of your „I want” power, visualise your goal, try to find your motivation 🤩
Sit down and answer those questions:
➡️ What encouraged you to set this goal?
➡️ What will happen when you reach it?
➡️ What will you gain?
If you want, find something that reminds you of important reasons why you started . It can be notes, picture of someone who succeeded and inspired you , some symbol of your motivation 💪. I always get most motivated by other people’s success 🤗.
What are you main core beliefs? 🤔
For me it’s:
🔸️ Be kind – always treat others how you want to be treated, don’t judge another person, especially if you don’t know the whole story
🔸️ Think positive – positive vibes really attract positive mind = positive life. Learn to appreciate what you got, to be happy about the little things, learn to see something good in the world around you
🔸️ Follow your dreams – set your steps that you need to take to reach your goal and try doing something everyday to pursue those dreams. It doesn’t have to be big, just keep taking small steps and keep moving forward. Anything is possible with hard work (and maybe a little luck)!
Which one out of those 3 is most important to you?
Keep reading my posts and I’ll teach you how to take care of/practice all 3 core beliefs 🙏
What are your core beliefs?
Last week we’ve talked about deferring gratification – does it apply to you? 🤔 Does your brain demand a reward here and now? 😬 Do you forget about your goal when you see something you want (e.g. a cake while being on a diet) and you easily succumb to temptation? 🧐
Don’t worry! The art of deferring gratification can be learned, same as you can train your willpower 💪.
Try this exercise from Kelly McGonigqal’s book „The Willpower Instinct”: It appears that 10 minutes is not a long time to wait for something we want. Neurologists however discovered that it has great impact on how your brain processes the vision of reward 🏆. If instant gratification is supposed to come after 10 minutes then our brain sees it as future benefit 🔜. Hence the system that processes the promise of a reward calms down and strong biological impulse to instant consummation weakens ⬇️.
In order for your brain 🧠 to think straight try waiting 10 minutes before you succumb to temptation. If after 10 minutes you still want it, take it/do it 😄. Before the time passes though try to think of long-term benefits you’ll get for resisting temptation. If it’s possible, try also creating some physical or visual distance ↔️.
If you need to do something you don’t feel like doing you can also use „10 minutes rule” to help you resist the temptation of delaying necessary actions and to force yourself a bit to do them😉. Try making it „do it for 10 minutes, then you can stop”. Let yourself stop working after 10 minutes – it might turn out that as you already had started you will want to continue 😉. For me, it’s always the most difficult to start working and when I do I usually want to finish so this trick works on me quie well 👍
Try doing that excercise and write down your results. „10 miutes rule” might work great when you don’t feel like working! ☺
How willpower actually works?🤔
Willpower divides into 3 parts:
🔸️Power „I want to” – power to do something even though you’d prefer to avoid it
🔸️Power „I don’t want to” – power helping push temptations away
🔸️Power „I desire!” – power that remembers what you desire in long-term
Willpower is what differs us from animals😉. By forseeing future you are able to not give in to impulses or instincts. We often want to delete lower impulses or some feelings but they are important too! 😉 For example disgust protects you from bad food 🥩, fear from danger ⚠️ and desires help you set goals 😊.
If you want to improve your willpower it is not about fighting impulses but about using them to help you 🙃.
Do you know that sometimes you make decisions on autopilot? 🤔 And that’s good because there are so many of them during a day that your brain would not be able to get to them all! 🤯
Your task for today is to notice that autopilot and improve your self-awarness 😉. Observe and write down the situations when you need your willpower. What thoughts, feelings, impulses appear in those situations? 🤔 Which moments/elements are crucial to making a decision? Noticing them will help you stop that bad autopilot and prepare for those situations earlier. 🤗
If you want to learn more about it I advice you to read Kelly McGonigal’s book „The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do To Get More of It”
Today let’s talk about how to plan your ‘to do’ list using your weaknesses and how to be ready to fight any excuse! 👊
You’ve already extablished what are your weaknesses, now knowing what could be your excuse against getting to work in the future, plan your response in advance! 😃
Imagine some future scenarios that could be an obstacle on your way to reaching your goal and find solution for it. Write them down like this: “If situation X happens, I’m gonna do Y”. 📃
➡️ For example, if you want to lose some weight and you plan to work out 4-5 times a week but then when that moment comes you don’t feel like it and end up staying on the sofa, prepare that strong anti-excuse sentence for you! 👊
🔸️ “If I’m gonna feel lazy and not willing to workout, I’m gonna watch supermodels on a runway to get motivated to look that way.” 😜
➡️ Or when you need to work on your start up business but don’t feel like it:
🔸️”If I’m gonna start watching tv instead of working on my business plan, I’m gonna stop and read some inspirational stories of famous entreprenours and how they started to be more motivated.”
It is important to prepare those anti-excuse sentences earlier when you feel very excited and motivated about some new plans! 🤩 E.g. I am always very motivated and ready to get busy on Sunday evening when I plan upcoming week, I tend to plan plenty things to do the next couple of days and then often don’t feel that excited & motivated to actually do them when that time comes 🙄 – that’s why it is so important to prepare those powerful sentences earlier (I’m preparing them on Sunday when planning everything) and write them down 📃. Then in a moment of weakness read that sentence! Something like a message to your future self! 😉
Try it out!
First lets focus on your strenghts. In previous step you named all your advantages, what you are good at, what comes easy for you. Now use it in building your plan! 🤗
🔸️Your strenght: I’m very organized 🤓
➡️ Example in practice: I’ll plan each week and each day precisely, what do I have to do to reach my goal. It’s easier for me to get to work with a propper ‘to do’ list.
🔸️ Your strenght: I’m flexible / creative 😜
➡️ Example in practice: Whenever new situation/obstacle appears don’t freak out. You’re creative, you got this! 💪Just sit down and think of a new way/new plan how to solve it/go around your obstacle 🤔.
E.g. I often work longer hours at work and end up with shorter time to work on my personal projects or suddenly get some family issue BUT I don’t cancel my ‘to do’ list completely 🚫. I work around it, leave those things that I can still manage to do that day and move some other stuff to the following day. Sometimes I change my ‘to do’ list even 5 times a day 🤪 but I never cross a thing to do off my list completely.
🔸️ Your strenght: I am able to work late hours but I’m not an early bird 😴
➡️ Example in practice: You know yourself best! If it’s hard for you to get up early (e.g. on Saturdays) don’t plan anything for early hours thinking (“ah, I’ll definitely manage to get up this time!”). If you’re a night owl plan your stuff to do for evenings! 😉 You know what your most productive time of the day is, use it!
Next week we’ll talk about how to plan your ‘to do’ list using your weaknesses and how to be ready to fight any excuse!
We’ve talked about goals in previous post (Motivational Monday, step 3).
Now let’s talk about dreams 🤩
What’s the difference? 🤫for me goals are about career, about work life, about something that we work on (or should be working on) everyday.
And dreams are something else. Something magical, about your personal life, your family, your free time. 😊💫
I told you yesterday that we’re going to Mexico in the end of October.
Why? It has been my dream to go to Mexico for their Dia de los Muertos since I was a teenager 🤩
And now it’s finally gonna happen!!
This is what gave me wings lately, the reason I’ve been so happy and full of energy 😄
And the trip is happening this year as a gift from myself to myself (and from my husband and parents a bit too 🥰) for my 30th bday! Dia de los Muertos that is celebrated on Nov 2nd is exactly 1 month till my big day! 😊
I literally cried happy tears when we bought the tickets 🥲.
Now tell me, what are your dreams?