Self-evolving · Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 16

I’ve got good news for you – willpower can be trained! 💪 It is often treated like something you either have or don’t but psychology researches show that you can train your strong will just like your muscles. And nobody was born with a 6-pack, right? 😉
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It is great news because those who aren’t scrupulous naturally can train it 💪. You’ve actually already started it with implementation intention (step 10) and by process visualisation (step 11) 😉
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Since willpower works like a muscle it has limited source of energy and strength. There are things that empower it 👍 but there are also things that weaken it 👎.
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Your goal is to get to know and, if possible, remove your obstacles to having strong will 😎. Those most basic ones are stress, tiredness and lack of sleep. It seems so simple, right? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Yet you do not always see the connection between those factors and your willpower.
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Task for today: Observe and write down (or analyze past experiences if you’re calm and rested today) how stress and tiredness have impact on your willpower:
* What situations are those?
* What happens then?
* How do you react?
* Is it harder for you to stick to your goal?
* Do you have any ways to help yourself and not to be tempted (turn your „I don’t want to” power on) or to do something that you don’t feel like doing (turn your „I want to” power)? Next week: Stress vs willpower (next week Smiley Future will be on Wednesday!)

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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 14

Today we start realising our goal! In upcoming steps willpower will be one of most important subjects. ⚠️
Here’s what’s most important.
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Willpower divides into 3 parts:
· Power to do something even though you’d prefer to avoid it (power „I want to!”) 💪
· Power helping push temptations away (power „I don’t want to”) 🚫
· Power that remembers  what you desire in long-term (power „I desire!”) 🤩 :::
Willpower is what differs us from animals. By forseeing future you are able to not give in to impulses or instincts ⚠️. Thinking about will power you often want to delete lower impulses or some feelins but they are important too! 😉
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For example disgust protects you from bad food, fear from danger and desires help you setting goals 😉. If you want to improve your willpower it is not about fighting impulses but about using them to help you 🤗
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How to manage your willpower? 🤔 For that you need to get to know yourself better. Only when you understand your way of thinking in a situation that requires your willpower then you can strengthen it 💪.
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You make many decisions on autopilot (and it’s good because there are s omany of them during a day that your brain would not be able to get to them all!😅) so your task for today is to notice that autopilot and improving you self-awarness.
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Observe and write down ✒
·What situations need your willpower? 🤔
· What thoughts, feelings, impulses appear in those situations? 🧐
· What decisions they lead you to? Supporting your goal or the opposite? 🤔
·  Which moments/elements are crucial to making a decision? Noticing them will help you stop that bad autopilot and prepare for those situations earlier. 🧐
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If you want to learn more about it I advice you to read Kelly McGonigal’s book „The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do To Get More of It” 📖
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Next week: Mind traps
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 13

This is our last step of preparations and after that you’ll be ready to start reaching your goal! 😊
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Now we need to focus on your surroundings and people around you. You are already well prepared so now it’s time to let your close ones know that there will be changes/that you’ll e.g. have less free time etc.
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While focusing on your resolutions and goals you could forget that it would be good to also get your close ones ready. Why?
* You have a chance to present them your plan and to explain why your goal is important to  you and ask them for support 🤝
* Once you’ll tell them about your resolution you’ll feel bigger pressure and it will be harder for you to let go once some obstacles come or you’ll have a bad day 😉
* While talking to your close ones you’ll see their reactions and you’ll know if  you can count on them and have their support or the opposite 😉
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Unfortunately it happens that family or friends react on someone’s will to change with resistance or even anger. There are plenty stories of girls who decided to drop couch potato life and and start working out, eating healthy and they heard „You better stop because you’ll be anorectic”, „Are you crazy?” etc. 🙄
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Usually it comes from people who know that they should change something about their lives too and because they don’t want to do it, it is easier for them to denny it, sabotage positive changes in person next to them etc. 🙄 If you get those kind of reactions look for support in somebody else like me and other members of Smiley Society! 🤗
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But I do hope that you’ll get positive comments only.
Next week: What is willpower and how does it work
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Next week:
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

📸 pic taken in Greece in 2015

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 9

🧠SMILEY FUTURE🧠 — Step 9
Creating plan based on your strenghts
In those difficult times we all need a bit of a break for your mind 🤯 Just sit down, relax and start creating your plan of action!
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You’ve been preparing it for the last 8 steps so I hope this will be easy and pleasant for you 😉
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I encourage you to write down how do you want to realize your goal (set in SMART method) with help of your strenghts from step 7 💪
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* What are you good at?
Example: I’m reliable. I always keep my promises.
Submission to the action plan: „I’ll make a pact with another person to workout togetherm then it’ll be easier for me to realise my training plan as I will want to be reliable to the other person”
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* What are you effective at? What kind of situations you feel biggest impact on?
Example: I’m very organised
Submission to the action plan: „I’ll organize a plan for a day/week this way so I’d have time for activities related to the goal – training, cooking, spending time with family, writing CV etc.”
That’s my way 🙋🏼‍♀️
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* If you’ve managed to establish who you can count on in your surroundings when it comes to realising your goal, somebody who has the knowledge and experience, turn to that person for an advice. Use the hints you get from him/her to make or change your plan. Be flexible and open to any hints you get. You know yourself best! How can you use somebody’s knowledge and experience?
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*Your life situation e.g. if your financial situation lets you buy training programs or a career consultation. Your family situation is important here too e.g. if you have small children maybe apart from husband your family or friends can help you find time to realise your goal? How will you use your life situation in your plan?
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I hope those examples showed you the essence of  today’s task – plan of action based on your strenghts. If you’ll get some comments while preparing this plan like what is difficult for you, what hardly ever works write them down, we’ll get back to them.
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Next week: How to use your weaknesses!

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow” 📸 pic taken in China in 2012 (yes, that’s me 😅)

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 7

You already summed up your last year, made a circle of life that showed you which part of life you should focus on and you set a SMART goal – specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and in time bound. Now it’s time to work on yourself and how to use both your strenghts AND weaknesses in achieving your goal 💪
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First of all say out loud what are your strenghts.
* What are you good at? 😁
* What comes easy for you? 🤔
* What are you effective at? 🙈 In what situations do you feel you have biggest impact on something, you feel your power? 💪
* Remind yourself of a difficult situation (at work, at home, some conflict or crisis) in which you did well. What skills, knowledge, experience helped you in it? 🤔
* What do your friends and family appreciate in you? 👍
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Now time for your external strenghts.
* On whose emotional support you can count? Who out of your family, close ones can and will give it to you? Who can you call in a moment of crisis, doubt? ☎️
* On whose support can you count? Who can give you good advice, some hints, answers when you need it? Who gives you honest feedback on how you’re doing? Apart from close ones this can be done in some Facebook groups, people trying to achieve same goal or fighting with similar difficulties. 💬
* What in your life situation will help you achieve this goal? Take your finances, moral support under consideration (e.g. friends/people who can help you create a nice CV, creat a well-balanced diet, create workout plan etc.) 🤔

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

SMILEY FUTURE – Step 6

🧠SMILEY FUTURE🧠
— Step 6 – Setting goals (I once posted it already but it’s an important reminder and next step in our Smiley Future)
Goals set right will help you UNDERSTAND the path you need to walk through, it will be easier for you to PLAN your next steps, it will be easier for you to CONTROL if it’s going good, there will be LESS PRESSURE and it will be easier for you to BE PERSISTANT 😊
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Goals need to set with a SMART method 🤓:
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S – Specific – Provide enough detail so that you know exactly what you should be doing. For example, stop setting goals such as „I need to lose 10kg in 3 months”. Make it more „I need to start eating more vegetables and workout 4 times a week” 🥦💪. This is more doable, you have more control over it (as you know exactly what you need to do) and there’s less pressure. Try sticking to it and just wait for results. Same with e.g. growing here on ig. Instead of setting a goal like „I need to get 1k new followers in a month” try „I need to post daily, take more colorful photos and interact with other users more”. Just do it and wait for the results 😉
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M – Measurable – A measurable goal has an outcome that can be assessed as a hit or miss ✔❌. So e.g. you can easily check whether you worked out 4 times this week or posted everyday.
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A – Achievable – An achievable goal has an outcome that is realistic given your current situation. Make sure you actually have the time 🕰 to workout 4 times a week or post daily. Don’t set such goal if you know you won’t make it.
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R – Realistic – Start small. If you set your goal too high („I need to lose 10kg in a month” or „I need to gain 10k followers in a month”) there’s too big pressure and you will give up quickly if you won’t see results you’d want 🤔
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T – Time Bound – Set a timeframe for the goal: „in three months”, „by six months”. Setting an end point for the goal gives you a clear target to achieve 🏁
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Now that you know how to set your goal right let me know what are your goals! 😊

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

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About me

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!!!
🎊🎉🎊🎉 What are your plans for this year? Do you have a goal?

Remember: “A goal without a plan is just a wish”
You’ll need a good plan!

2018 was important for me due to big steps in my life (marriage and moving in to our 1st home of our own) but 2019 will be for my dreams and self-growth! I want to make this blog big (please help me 😊) + i’ll tell you soon about this goal of mine that i’ve been working on for 7 years – it will be important this year!