Tag: good mindset

7 things you should drop in 2021
positive · Self-Love

7 things you should drop in 2021

smileysocietyLeave a comment

⚠️7 things you should drop in 2021:
➡️ Living in the past 🙄– cut off 2020 for good and forget about it! 😅
➡️ Need to please everyone around you 😓 – not everyone deserves your time and effort, focus more on yourself! 🤗
➡️ Fear of change 😱 – change is good! Everybody is scared of something new, something unknown but it is so worth to take the risk usually and change e.g. your job, school or even a partner! 😜 If you feel that it’s a good change but you’re scared of it, go for it! 💪 It might be scary at first but in some time you’ll be glad you did it! 😚
➡️ Overthinking and excessive analyzing everything 🤯 – just stop! ❌ Don’t worry about problems that aren’t here, don’t analyze a situation that hasn’t happened yet! Stop imagining future problems and just focus on here & now 🙏
➡️ Cancelling time and/or plans for yourself in favour of people who won’t appreciate it 🙄 – if you have plans to stay at home in the evening in pjs and spend some quality time with yourself that’s ok 🤗! Don’t feel about it and don’t change those plans because of somebody else ❌
➡️Belief that you don’t have a purpose 😞 – yes you do! Bigger than you may think! 😚
➡️ Pretending to be someone you’re not 🤡 – just be yourself! Being yourself is trendy 😉
:::
After tough 2020 (but don’t think about it now, it’s done, gone, we’re not living in the past 😅) we all need a propper self-love time! 🙏❤ Let’s make a whole month of it or even a year! 🤗
:::
I’m doing a 28-day self-care challenge in February on my Instagram! 🤗 I’ll be giving  tasks for you everyday in the morning to do something for yourself 🤗, I’ll be sharing even more recipes for homemade cosmetics 🧖‍♀️, uploading videos for relaxing/meditation sessions 🧘🏼‍♀️ and basically giving lots of love and encouraging you to take care of yourself! 😘
See my instastories for more info!

Smiley Future – Step 46
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 46

smileysocietyLeave a comment

Today’s the last step of our intense (and uneasy!) work on sabotaging thoughts 💪
:::
➡️Today’s task nr 1: Now appreciate yourself for all the hard work and congratulate yourself on your success 😎. Yes, success because just noticing the sabotaging thoughts is already a big part of the success! 😉
:::
I realize that working on sabotaging thoughts lasts longer than a week or a month. Those last couple steps were only a stimulus and en encouragement to work! 💪 So remember: everytime you notice a sabotaging thought appreciate yourself with a smile and a good word! 🙏 Same thing when you choose a helpful reaction instead of being tempted! 🤗
:::
If a sabotaging thought you ‘caught’ wasn’t pleasant, you got tense or upset, after recalling a helpful/supporting thought take couple deep breaths and relax your body 🧘🏼‍♀️
:::
➡️ And now task nr 2: Create a system of awarding yourself (daily, weekly, monthly) for your hard work on sabotaging thoughts 🏆. You deserve it! 🤗
:::
Write down some nice, supporting words to yourself appreciating your work 📝
:::
Next week: How emotions influence your willpower 🤔
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future – Step 43
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 43

smileysocietyLeave a comment

As you my remember from last week’s step sabotaging thoughts are on a subconscious level and are often irrational 🤔. Don’t judge them but also don’t ignore them – take them seriously. Even if they seem silly, weird or without any sense to you carefully look into them 🧐
:::
Why is it worth to do it? Here are couple reasons:
🔶️Sabotaging thoughts can:
➡️ Bring down your self-confidence
➡️ Let you reject knowledge, good advices or hints from others
➡️ Increase general stress level (and that weakens your strong will! Remember step 17?)
 :::
That’s why task for today is: keep observing your sabotaging thoughts (and when you notice them, write them down! 📝) while remembering to be good to yourself! 😉
:::
Next week: Create your helpful recreation
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future – Step 30
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 30

smileysocietyLeave a comment

Today we continue subject of deferring gratification. If, after last week’s task, you already know that it brings you problems I have good news for you: you can practice the ability to defer gratification (so self-control) 🤗.
:::
This exercise is from Kelly McGonigqal’s book „The Willpower Instinct”:
It appears that 10 minutes is not a long time to wait for something we want 🕰. Neurologists however discovered that it has great impact on how your brain processes the vision of reward 🤔.
:::
If inatant gratification is supposed to come after 10 minutes then our brain sees it as future benefit ➡️. Then the system that processes the promise of a reward calms down and strong biological impulse to instant consummation weakens ⬇️.
:;:
Our brain comparing a cookie that we have to wait 10 minutes for 🍪 with a long-term benefit like losing weight 💪 stops leaning towards promised reward that much. In the instant gratification it is the ‘instant’ part that seduces our brain and changes our preferences 🧠
:::
In order for your brain to think straight make a decision to always wait 10 minutes before you succumb to temptation 😉. If after 10 minutes you still want it, take it. Before the time passes though try to think of long-term benefits you’ll get for resisting temptation. If it’s possible, try also creating some physical or visual distance.
:::
If your challenge for willpower requires using „I want” strenght (so doing something you don’t feel like doing) you can also use „10 minutes rule” to help you resist the temptation of delaying necessary actions and to force yourself a bit to do them 😉.
:::
Try making it „do it for 10 minutes, then you can stop”. Let yourself stop working after 10 minutes – it might turn out that as you already had started you will want to continue 😉
:::
Try making that excercise and write down your results. „10 miutes rule” might work great when you  don’t feel like working out! 💪😁

Next week: How to fight temptation!
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future – Step 28
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 28

smileysociety2 Comments

How do you relax? 😉
Today’s last part of „Be good to yourself” series.
:::
Do you remember when we talked about factors that weaken your strong will? 🤔 It was stress and tiredness and lately we’ve been talking a lot about the danger of treating yourself badly and punishing (and getting into a trap of „everything or nothing” thinking” ⚠️).
:::
That’s why sometimes in order to rebuild and strengthen strong will you need rest, regeneration and pleasures that will give you energy and motivation to work 🤗.
:::
Task for today: Make a list of your ways of relax and pleasures. It is important so that they wouldn’t be contradictory to your goal (so e.g. don’t write on your list „eating huge pizza” or „eating chocolate cookies”  when your goal is to eat healthy 😉).
:::
It might be an evening with a good book 📖 or a movie 🎬, talk or meeting with a friend 💬, relaxing bath 🛀, walk around the neighbourhood 🏞, playing with dog 🐶, relaxing yoga session etc. 🧘🏼‍♀️
:::
So what are your ways to relax? Tell me! 😊

Next week: Sometimes it’s better to postpone
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future – Step 27
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 27

smileysocietyLeave a comment

What’s the difference between punishment and self-discipline? 🤔 Perhaps you’ve already asked yourself that on our last step about punishing yourself. How to distinguish it? 🧐
:::
You don’t want to be too strict but on the other hand you need self-discipline so as not to spend the rest of your life living lazily and letting everything go and not reaching any goals 😉.
:::
Do you know that the word „discipline” means in latin knowledge, giving orders, teaching? 👨🏻‍🎓 As you see it has nothing to do with punishment, right? 😊
:::
Authors of many books about discipline emphasize that it comes from constant attempts. You fail, you get up wiser and move on 💪. Self-discipline is an effect of your effort and not giving up on next attempts.
:::
While main task of the punishment is to scare, it only teaches us what to avoid, brings tension, and often, fear and anger 🤢.
:::
I hope that you see now the difference and as to be good to yourself you’ll start liking self-discipline and avoid punishing 🤗
:::
How to distinguish them in practice? Common ground of those two often is the will to avoid some activity. Sometimes we need to force ourselves to do something that is beneficial to us (e.g. working out).
:::
How can we know if our forcing is a part of self-discipline or punishment? 🤔
If you’re not sure think of a situation when you really don’t feel like doing something and answer couple questions:
*Sitation:
*What do you feel then? 🤔
*Is my body tense or loose? Do I clutch my jaw, feel tension in my arms? 😓
:::
If you feel a lot of tension, anger or fear and negative thoughts about yourself pop into your head it is probably closer to punishment than to self-discipline. You’ll recognize self-discipline when you’ll  be easily able to say why activity that you’re trying to force yourself to is good and beneficial to you 🤗

Nexy week: Learn to rest
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future – Step 25
Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 25

smileysocietyLeave a comment

How did last excercise go? Did you manage to sincerely answer to the questions? 🤔 If you have you might’ve noticed that you can be too strict to yourself and today you’re gonna find out how to change it 🤗
:::
Remember last situation when you’ve made a mistake, a situation when you thought bad about yourself. Got it? What did you think of yourself then? What were you saying to yourself? 🤔
:::
Now imagine that you best friend, a relative, somebody close to you comes to you and tells you that she/he has had an identical situation and she/he is waiting for your reaction. What would you tell her/him? 😉
:::
Task for today: Compare what you say to yourself and what would you say to a person close to you in the same situatio 🤗

Next week: Learning without punishing yourself
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Quarantine sum up
About me · Be positive!

Quarantine sum up

smileysocietyLeave a comment

So tell me – how you’ve been lately? 🤗
I gotta say that those last 3 months has been really productive to me and I am satisfied with what I’ve managed to do. Apart from doing 200-300% norm at work I managed to work a lot on my personal projects/dreams too 😊.
:::
Obviously I’ve spent looooads of time doing stuff for @smileysociety and for you here 😉 – I’ve been posting regularly, working on special stories for you, created Positive Morning Posts 🙂 with good news and Chill Evening Sessions 🌠 to make you feel better during those times, I’ve made #SmileyTravelling Challenge for you on my ig so we wouldn’t miss travelling that much and plenty more.
:::
Even though working on my blog  here took me 60-70% of my free time I used the rest of it to get into shape 💪and to read 📖! I’ve never been working out so regularly as I have now – been working out 3-4 times a week lately and I loved it 💙! I also challanged myself to read 1 book a month and so I’ve read 3 books since April – it is a lot for me as I usually don’t read that much anymore 😅.
:::
Apart from it all I started serious work on my 2nd novel, planning & plotting, creating characters and ideas for the plot and I am planning to start writing it in October ✒
:::
Even though it’s been horrible at times, I’ve been scared, I missed my family, I missed my friends, I pushed myself to the limits as if the world was ending 😅! I just didn’t want this time to go to waste and I am so glad I did!
:::
And even though I am tired and I am dreaming of holidays at last 😅 I am satisfied with my work in 1st half of 2020 and I still believe this will be my year 😉
:::
So what I’ve been trying to say is that no matter how bad the situation is (and I don’t mean only Covid-19 and quarantine times but anything else too) always try to do your best 💪. We all react to bad situations  differently obviously and if  somebody was really scared during last months, felt anxious and didn’t do anything productive that’s fine too! But when you look back now to those insecure times forget about all the bad stuff and focus on what you have done and what you’ve managed to accomplish 🤗
:::
Now it’s all gonna be better! 😊