Be positive!

Unhappy to choose

I feel like nowadays people are unhappy because…there’s too much to choose from! Yes, exactly, because there are too many options 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Subconsciously we want to have EVERYTHING so once we have to choose 1 thing out of 30 we become stressed, anxious about the decision and then in the end unhappy about the choice we made 🤯.
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Daniel Levitin tells a story in „The Organized Mind” about one of his students years ago who came to USA from Romania (Soviet at the time). He recalls how he met this girl in a store in front of a shelf full of different pens almost crying. She wasn’t able to pick one. Back in Romania they had only 3 types of pen and that’s it. “Which one do I need for my biology class? Which one for poetry? Do I want felt tip, ink, gel, cartrifge, erasable? Ballpoint, razor point, roller ball?” ✒🖋🖊.
Then once she chooses she’ll be worried if she got the right one. She’ll go back home and will want the other one, the one she didn’t buy.
Sounds familiar?
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It may sound as a simple and quite basic example but if you think about it you choose a product every day 🤷🏼‍♀️. You do grocery shopping and you choose one milk before the other, you choose one jumper instead of another one, you choose one smartphone instead of a different brand. We make hundreds decisions everyday and once we decide we keep wanting the thing we didn’t get! Mind will always want something that is out of reach, something that we are missing 🤷🏼‍♀️.
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We are all forced to make plenty decisions every day and this can easily make one unhappy 😬😰.
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BUT!
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Instead of thinking what you DIDN’T get think of what you DID get!
Appreciate that smartphone, smile at this new jumper, appreciate that pen! 🤗
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Do you know why people in Africa or South America are happier than us? (I trully believe they are). Because they don’t have that ‘problem’! They simply appreciate what they have. They don’t have dozens brands of milk to choose from and wonder if that’s the right choice. They are simply happy because they got milk.
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Minimalism and gratitude.
That’s the answer to it. Learn to choose 1 thing, to be happy about it and to forget about the ones you didn’t choose! 🙏


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Be positive! · Self-evolving

Past dreams

Remember what did you use to dream about? What were your goals once? 🤔
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Maybe you dreamed about a job you have now? Maybe you were trying to get a girl that is now your wife? Maybe you tried to buy that dream house that you call your home nowadays? Are you still happy about those things? Do you appreciate what you have? That you have what you dreamed of some time ago?
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People tend to forget to be happy about what they have. To be grateful for where they are.
You got your dreams! You won! 🤗
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Obviously once we get one thing we dream of another but don’t forget about the goals you’ve already achieved 🙏. Be happy about the job you got that you wanted so badly in the past, be happy about the girl of your dreams that is now by your side and be happy about every little dream you’ve accomplished!
Don’t take anything for granted ⚠️

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Learn to be grateful

Learn to be grateful
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I’ve already said it and I’ll keep repeating – key to being happy is to be grateful 🙏. You need to learn to appreciate what you have, to feel happy about the little things, to feel gratitude 🤗. You can’t take anything for granted, even such „simple” (some would say 🙄) things as being able to see or having a roof over your head.
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If you think that you don’t have anything to be grateful for go and do a volunteering at a hospice 🏥 or child care home 🏠. Talk to those poor children, ask them what makes them happy, tell them your story and see what they think about it, if you really don’t have anything to be grateful for 😏.
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Go and spend a day with a blind person. Or even better – cover your eyes for 1 whole day and try to live and do normal every-day activities.
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Go and live on a street for one night. Try to get some food. Find a place to sleep 😨.
::: Go and do all those things.
Still nothing to be grateful for?
Think about it. ⚠️
People keep forgeting about the most basic things and they tend to take them for granted whereas we should be grateful to be healthy, to be able to see, to have a family, to have 2 hands and 2 legs everyday. ⚠️
I sure am. 🙏


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Be positive! · Self-evolving

Little things

We’ve learned about gratitude (see my previous post) now it’s time to learn to notice those little things/aspects we need to be grateful for. 👀
In my yesterday’s post I wrote about being grateful and noticing big aspects like being healthy, having family or not being blind but today I want you to learn how to be happy about the little things. This is another KEY TO HAPPINESS. ⚠️⚠️⚠️ Good stuff won’t happen to you everyday, let’s face it. But in order to be happy everyday you need to smile at the little things. 😊 Like the color of the sky, good weather or delicious food 😋. If you think about it, good things DO happen to you everyday, you just need to look for them sometimes. 😁
Look around you, stop for a moment and look at other people. Have a look at colors of your surrounding. Appreciate small gestures from other people like a waiter taking care of you and being friendly in a restaurant or a doctor that wants to help you and take care of your comfort ❤. Look at the street you pass everyday, notice its buildings and their details. We tend to be in rush all the time and doing many things automatically. Stop.⚠️ You need to be present in a moment to appreciate here and now.⚠️
Focus on the things you’re doing. Stop doing everything automatically. Your mind is off then and it doesn’t appreciate the things that are happening. Before you start eating your meal stop and appreciate its colors, its smell. 👃
Just slow down and try to be present.❤
This is called MINDFULLNESS. There are many excercises to develop it so you appreciate some situations or moments more and do less things automatically.
One of the excercises is eating a raisin – perfect for beginners. Act like you’ve never eaten or seen a raisin before. Notice the way the raisin looks, how it feels, its smell or taste. Then slowly eat it but focus on it.👅
If you want to excercise it and learn to be present here and now hence appreciate your life more see this article – https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/mindfulness-exercises-techniques-activities/

Be positive! · Bez kategorii · Self-evolving

Gratitude

One of the main and easiest ways to happiness is being GRATEFUL.
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Are you grateful for what you have? If you’re thinking „what do I have to be grateful for?!” you’re probably one of those people who have lots but don’t appreciate it. You don’t have to be a millionaire or have a perfect life to be grateful. People tend to think that they don’t have anything to be grateful because they’re not rich or because they have some problems. ALL people have problems. Poor ones and rich ones. ⚠️
But the key is to appreciate what you have.
Are you healthy?
Do you have a place to live?
Do you have food in your fridge? Do you have family?
Do you have friends?
Do you have both legs?
Are you able to see, hear, talk? There are so many things /aspects that we need to be grateful for yet most of us take those things for granted.
People keep thinking that it is an absurd to be grateful that we see or have both legs. That it is a given. Well sadly not for everyone. Imagine not having that. I am grateful I am healthy, able to see, hear and walk everyday! ❤❤❤ The truth is, there are many people who lost their legs, are blind, deaf or very sick but still can appreciate life and be happy and those are the people we should follow and learn from them! 💪
Do you have both parents? I know this may not be as simple as the 1st question in the age of divorces but even if you have only one parent you are still more lucky than all those poor children living in shelter houses.
Did you have dinner today? So simple right? Yet still, if you have, you are still more lucky than millions of people in the world who starve to death.
You have PLENTY OF THINGS TO BE GRATEFUL FOR! You just need to learn to see them. 👀
You can do an easy exercise – write down what are you grateful for on a piece of paper and put it in a jar. Keep doing it for next 30 days. You’ll see how many things you have to be grateful for! + when you’ll have a bad day you can read them all and it will make you feel better. 😊

What are you grateful for?

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Excercise

Did you know that to form a habit you need only 21 days? After repeating something every day for 3 weeks it grows into you and you do it automatically. For example if you need to remember to take vitamins after breakfast 💊 (do it!) you need to remember about it and focus on the moment of you taking the vitamins out of the drawer for 21 days and after that you just do it every day without even thinking about it (like me for last 3 years 😊).
It is said to be working same way when starting a diet – you need 21 days of you saying „NO! ⛔” to sugars and unhealthy food and after those 3weeks of a hard struggle you’ll do it easily, automatically or won’t even be craving sweets. 🥦🥒🍅🥗
But did you know that you can also reprogram/rewire your brain to be happy in 21 days? 🤗
I mean, WOAH! Right?🤩
And here’s my TASK FOR YOU.⚠️ For the next 3 weeks when you wake up think of 3 things you are grateful for and keep repeating it for…now guess…21 days, yes 😊
It can be same 3 things every day or it can be various things. Your choice. Just stick to it.
What is more, you can practice being more confident too 💪. Think of 3 values/qualities you like about yourself, some advantages you have, and say it to yourself out loud in front of a mirror every day for 21 days. I guarantee you’ll be more confident and more proud of those qualities. Just try it.
So what are you grateful for?
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I am grateful for a healthy family 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧, loving husband ❤ and our financial situation (being able to pay rent 🏡, buy food 🍕 and having a nice life 🎉🏖).