Motivational Mondays

MOTIVATIONAL MONDAY – STEP 12: Learning how to defer gratification

Last week we’ve talked about deferring gratification – does it apply to you? 🤔 Does your brain demand a reward here and now? 😬 Do you forget about your goal when you see something you want (e.g. a cake while being on a diet) and you easily succumb to temptation? 🧐
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Don’t worry! The art of deferring gratification can be learned, same as you can train your willpower 💪.
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Try this exercise from Kelly McGonigqal’s book „The Willpower Instinct”: It appears that 10 minutes is not a long time to wait for something we want. Neurologists however discovered that it has great impact on how your brain processes the vision of reward 🏆. If instant gratification is supposed to come after 10 minutes then our brain sees it as future benefit 🔜. Hence the system that processes the promise of a reward calms down and strong biological impulse to instant consummation weakens ⬇️.
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In order for your brain 🧠 to think straight try waiting 10 minutes before you succumb to temptation. If after 10 minutes you still want it, take it/do it 😄. Before the time passes though try to think of long-term benefits you’ll get for resisting temptation. If it’s possible, try also creating some physical or visual distance ↔️.
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If you need to do something you don’t feel like doing you can also use „10 minutes rule” to help you resist the temptation of delaying necessary actions and to force yourself a bit to do them😉. Try making it „do it for 10 minutes, then you can stop”. Let yourself stop working after 10 minutes – it might turn out that as you already had started you will want to continue 😉. For me, it’s always the most difficult to start working and when I do I usually want to finish so this trick works on me quie well 👍
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Try doing that excercise and write down your results. „10 miutes rule” might work great when you don’t feel like working! ☺

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 69

Today let’s focus on summing up on your tools which we used for the last 16 months in our Smiley Future 🤗. Which ones became most useful to you? 🤔
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Here’s a list of those most important ones:
🔸️ Building a goal with SMART method (step 6)
🔸️ Implementation intention (step 10)
🔸️ Process visualisation with positive or negative outcome (step 11)
🔸️ Training will power: reducing stress (step 17), improving your willpower by breathing (step 18), autoobservation (step 19), beating tiredness and feeling burnt out (step 20), finding the source of your ‘I desire’ power (step 20) – which of those elements did you find most useful?
🔸️ Ways of being good to yourself (step 25)
🔸️ Ways of deferring gratification (step 30)
🔸️ Ways of beating procrastination (step 32)
🔸️ Ways to fight lack of motivation (step 37)
🔸️ Working on your sabotagin thoughts (step 42-45)
🔸️ Observing the impact of emotions on your willpower (step 47)
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Which one of those tools helped you most? 🤔
In what way can you use them in the future?
Write down your reflections 📝
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Next week: Summing up: Practicing mindfullness
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s book “90 days – design your tomorrrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 30

Today we continue subject of deferring gratification. If, after last week’s task, you already know that it brings you problems I have good news for you: you can practice the ability to defer gratification (so self-control) 🤗.
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This exercise is from Kelly McGonigqal’s book „The Willpower Instinct”:
It appears that 10 minutes is not a long time to wait for something we want 🕰. Neurologists however discovered that it has great impact on how your brain processes the vision of reward 🤔.
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If inatant gratification is supposed to come after 10 minutes then our brain sees it as future benefit ➡️. Then the system that processes the promise of a reward calms down and strong biological impulse to instant consummation weakens ⬇️.
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Our brain comparing a cookie that we have to wait 10 minutes for 🍪 with a long-term benefit like losing weight 💪 stops leaning towards promised reward that much. In the instant gratification it is the ‘instant’ part that seduces our brain and changes our preferences 🧠
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In order for your brain to think straight make a decision to always wait 10 minutes before you succumb to temptation 😉. If after 10 minutes you still want it, take it. Before the time passes though try to think of long-term benefits you’ll get for resisting temptation. If it’s possible, try also creating some physical or visual distance.
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If your challenge for willpower requires using „I want” strenght (so doing something you don’t feel like doing) you can also use „10 minutes rule” to help you resist the temptation of delaying necessary actions and to force yourself a bit to do them 😉.
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Try making it „do it for 10 minutes, then you can stop”. Let yourself stop working after 10 minutes – it might turn out that as you already had started you will want to continue 😉
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Try making that excercise and write down your results. „10 miutes rule” might work great when you  don’t feel like working out! 💪😁

Next week: How to fight temptation!
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 29

Please read and let me know if it sounds familiar 😉

You’re standing in front of a bakery and you see a yummy cookie 🤤. Your friend brings donuts to work 😍. You feel lilke joining your husband and watch TV instead of working out 📺.
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Your brain demands a reward here and now! 🏆. You forget about your goal and all the reasons why you wanted to achieve it. You succumb to temptation… 😞
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Or maybe…?
With your last remains of strongwill you step away from bakery 🤚, you leave dounts from friend somewhere out of sight 🚫, you leave husband in front of TV and you walk into another room to workout and on your way there you remind yourself that each workout gets you closer to your dream body 💪.
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The ability to postpone pleasures or rewards is called ‘deferring gratification’ in psychology 🧠. It is crucial to realize long-distance goals because it helps you not to succumb to temptation each time but to resist because of you goal that is somewhere in the future 😎.
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Why is it so hard to defer gratification? Because seeing temptation or reward instantly launches more primitive and oldest part of our brain demanding gratification right away 🤯. Luckily we also have prefrontal cortex (part of our brain) that can cool that instant rush and demand down because it is responsible for controlling our impulses 🤚.
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Task for today: think how deferring gratification looks in your case 🤔
In what situations is it easier or more difficult to you? 🤔
What helps you defer gratification? 🧐
What makes deferring gratification hard or impossible to you? 🤨

Next week: Deferring gratification – excercise
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”