Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 46

Today’s the last step of our intense (and uneasy!) work on sabotaging thoughts 💪
:::
➡️Today’s task nr 1: Now appreciate yourself for all the hard work and congratulate yourself on your success 😎. Yes, success because just noticing the sabotaging thoughts is already a big part of the success! 😉
:::
I realize that working on sabotaging thoughts lasts longer than a week or a month. Those last couple steps were only a stimulus and en encouragement to work! 💪 So remember: everytime you notice a sabotaging thought appreciate yourself with a smile and a good word! 🙏 Same thing when you choose a helpful reaction instead of being tempted! 🤗
:::
If a sabotaging thought you ‘caught’ wasn’t pleasant, you got tense or upset, after recalling a helpful/supporting thought take couple deep breaths and relax your body 🧘🏼‍♀️
:::
➡️ And now task nr 2: Create a system of awarding yourself (daily, weekly, monthly) for your hard work on sabotaging thoughts 🏆. You deserve it! 🤗
:::
Write down some nice, supporting words to yourself appreciating your work 📝
:::
Next week: How emotions influence your willpower 🤔
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 42

Does it happen to you sometimes that you do something automatically and then you think why did it happen like that and you complain on lack of motivation and strong will? 🧐
:::
If yes, then next couple steps are for you as we will be working on catching automatic thoughts that sabotage your effort ⚠️
:::
Before every action (or resignation of acting) some thoughts appear 🤔. They often appear on a subconcious level so we might not notice them and that’s why we tend to think that they’re „stronger” than us 🤷🏼‍♀️.
:::
Today I encourage you to look deeper at thoughts that sabotage your effort 🧐. Try observing them while you’re fighting with some temptation or you feel like resigning from some important activity (e.g. workout). What do you notice? What happens then? 🤔 Write down what thoughts you observe 📝 and everytime, no matter how irrational or hard to accept they might be, congratulate yourself 👏! It is hard work on yourself so it is very important that you appreciate you for doing it! 🤗
:::
What are your thoughts that usually sabotage your goal?
Mine is usually: „I don’t feel like it”, „I’m too tired” or „I don’t know exactly how to do it” 🤷🏼‍♀️
:::
Next week: Know your sabotaging thoughts
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Self-Love

SELF-LOVE: 5 Self-love Exercises That You Need To Practice. NOW

The situation in the world is more and more intense 😓 (and even more intense in Poland now as government keeps taking our rights, now e.g. with an abortion 😡), we are all more and more stressed (I know I am) so it is EVEN MORE IMPORTANT to take care of our mental health now, to be good to ourselves and to practice self-love 🙏
:::
What are the Benefits Of Practising Self Love Exercises?
By getting into the habit of practising a self-care routine you will:
:::
🔅 Nourish your body with healthy food and activities
🔅Put yourself first sometimes and learn to say ‘no’.
🔅Take a much-needed break from social media without feeling utterly guilty and wretched.
🔅Indulge without feeling guilty.
🔅Learn to recognise thoughts for what they are and not act upon them.
🔅Love and respect yourself more
:::
5 Self-love Exercises That You Need To Practice. NOW
➡️ # 1: Write 📝
Sit and write down everything that’s on your mind.
:::
➡️ # 2: Walk 🚶‍♂️🚶‍♀️
Pick some excluded, quiet place, put a warm jumper & face mask on and go for a walk.
:::
➡️ # 3: Make a Date With Yourself 💖
Watch some movie you love, read a good book, draw, paint, just spend some quality time with you and you only!
:::
➡️ # 4: Workout 💪
Working out is always good. It’s not only about health benefits but it is good for your mind too! Let it all go. Just let all your anger or frustration out – kickboxing is best for that! You’ll feel so much better!
:::
➡️ # 5: Don’t forget the small things 🎁
Get yourself something nice! Maybe buy some girly magazine to read about some totally trivial things? Or  go online shopping and get new pair of earing or some new book? Anything that will make you happy! 🤗

Remember to treat yourself well! 😘

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 20

As I have mentioned before, psychogists compare willpower to a muscle 💪 so they imply that we can train it and that it has its limits.
:::
Just like muscles our self-control can also get…tired 😪. And that’s the moment when we often think that we no longer have the power and give up 🤷🏼‍♀️
:::
I am sure you know this feeling – you e.g. do a squat or a plank, you are supposed to keep it for 30 seconds, muscles burn like crazy and it’s only 14, 15, 16 seconds… A thought appears in your mind „I won’t make it, I am tired, I am not strong enough!” 😫. You are facing a challenge then – either let it go and stop the excercise earlier or force yourself to check if you’re maybe stronger than you think..💪
:::
Willpower works exactly the same! Next time when you face such situation try to get through first feeling of tiredness. Don’t give up straight away, you might find out that despite that tiredness you still have plenty energy and more willpower that you’ve assumed. 😉
:::
Be careful – you can also overtrain your willpower. If you feel overwhelming tiredness that doesn’t go away don’t push yourself to exhaustion ⚠️. Get some rest, regenerate and then try again 😇.
:::
If you feel tired all the time you should think what’s the cause of that. Maybe stress, lack of sleep, Hypothyroidism? 🤔 Reasons of that can be plenty so if you often feel tired don’t ignore it ⚠️ Next week: Source of your „I desire” power
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 19

In previous step we’ve establilshed what can weaken your willpower, today we’re gonna talk how to empower it! 💪
Let’s try doing willpower training, shall we?
:::
How does it work if comparing willpower to a muscle is metaphorical? 🤔 The key to successful willpower training is noting, which you will do in a second, and chosing what’s harder for you. It is about creating a habit of stoping  to make right decision that brings you closer to your goal 😌.
:::
There are 3 ways to train your willpower. They refer to 3  powers: „I don’t want to”, „I desire” and automonitoring.
:::
Method 1: Improve your „I don’t want to” power. Chose one of your small bad habits that you’d like to change/eliminate like overusing some word, sitting wrong or anything else 😊
:::
Method 2: Improve your „I desire” power. Promise to yourself that you’ll start doing 1 thing a day that brings you closer to your goal (that you haven’t been doing before). It can be working out, drinking 1,5l of water a day, self-care ritual etc 😊
:::
Method 3: Improve automonitoring. Consciously observe something that you usually pay attention to and which is important to reach your goal, e.g. monitor what you eat (and what you snack between meals! 😉), what do you spend money on, how much time do you spend with your close ones etc. 😊
:::
It is important that you find small ways for practicing your self-control 🧠. Remember that willpower works like muscle and you can also overtrain it ⚠️. Don’t throw yourself in the deep end, start slowly, start small. 😉
Which method will you start with?
Next week: Willpower vs tiredness
:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”
P.s. It is Mother’s Day today in Poland 😊💕 and I’m gonna see my Mom finally today after almost 4 months

Be positive!

Reaction

Do you know Tony Robbins’ famous story about two brothers? 👬 There was two brothers who had an abussive alcoholic father. Their childhood was very dark, they lived in poverty 😞. Years later, when they grew up, one brother was very successful 💰, had a well-known company, wife and kids 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦, was contributing to society, volunteering etc and another one was an alcoholic too 😪🍾. Somebody asked both of them „How is it possible? 🤷🏼‍♀️ How is it possible you didn’t turn out the same? Why do you think you became a volunteer? Why did you think you became an alcoholic?”. Both answered same thing „Who else could I become with a father like this?”
:::
We can’t control what happens to us but we can control how we react to it ⚠️. You can either feel sorry about yourself, be miserable and live miserable life or you can turn your disappointment/sadness into energy and use it to make your life better 💪
:::
There are so many people with same stories yet different endings. There are so many people who’s had abussive childhood but wanted to leave it behind them and achieve something big 🤩! There are so many examples of it among famous people like Lady Gaga, Jennifer Lawrence, Dwayne Johnson, Joaquin Phoenix, Oprah, Tony Robbins himself…just look at my Inspirational Stories 😉! All of them had difficult childhood and look at them now! 😎🎬🏆
:::
Bad things happen to people everyday. It’s sad but it’s true 🤷🏼‍♀️. But it’s our choice what we’re gonna do with it! First of all appreciate what you have 🙏, secondly learn from your mistakes/failures/sad experience and then use it to build a better future 📈!
:::
I know it’s harder than it sounds but it is all in your hands 🤲. You have all the tools to make your life happy, it’s  your move to use them. Nobody is going to do it for you 😉. It’s all in your hands and in your mind.

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 18

Do you know that willpower is a part of our intincts? 🤔 Last week we talked about „fight or flight” response and today we’re gonna talk about „pause-and-plan response” – my favourite 😉
:::
This mechanism stops an arousal in our body (the one we feel e.g. when seeing a cake 🤤) and increases the amount of the energy that goes into your mind 🧠. Prefrontal cortex, a part of our brain that is responsible for controlling impulses and planning, starts to work harder 💪. It shares an information with other parts of the mind: Launching self-control! Thanks to it we can take deep breath, stop with a hand on a bag of chips, think and…put it down 😉
:::
Now the good news – not only is self-control a strong instinct like „fight or flight” reaction but you can actually help launching it! 😊 There is an easy, free and accessible for everybody way to do it – the key is to learn to breathe properly. That’s right, breathe. 💨
:::
In order to improve your willpower slow down the rhythm of your breathing, do 4-6 breaths in a minute 🙏. Try to make each one last 10-15 seconds. But don’t hold your breath (it will only make you feel stressed!) but slowly make each inhale and exhale longer. It is easier to start with prolonging your exhale first. Make sure to exhale all out, this way it is easier to take deep breath in.
:::
It requires practicing so don’t get mad when you don’t get that rhythm right away. The more you practice the better! 😉
Next week: Empowering your willpower :::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 17

Today’s step is a bit long but it is SO important in everyday life ⚠️
How big impact does stress have on willpower? In order to answer that question I’ll tell you about „fight 👊 or flight ✈ response”. It is a physiological reaction when seeing danger that’s been protectin people for centuries from deadly threats.
:::
How does it work? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Let’s say you’ve noticed a venomous snake on your path. A part of your brain called amygdala reacts instantly and it prepares your body to fight or run away. The secretion of stress hormones increases, liver releases fats and sugars giving organism energy, lungs start to work faster to oxygenate body, the blood circulation accelerates (that’s why heart start to beat so fast!) to deliver needed substances to all cells. Basically whole organism is mobilizing for you to have best shot to survive 💪. In order not to delay your reactions the activity of the prefrontal cortex, so the part of your brain that is responsible for controlling impuleses, decreases ⬇️
:::
What does it mean? Stress physically decreases your ability to self-control ⚠️
Brain still works in the same way as if you were standing in front of a venomous snake and it starts fight or flight reaction. E.g. when you see an annoying e-mail from your boss 😉. That’s why it is so important to learn to deal with stress!
:::
Task for today divides into 3 parts:
1. Try relaxation. Lie down or sit down in a comfortable position 🧘🏼‍♀️, close your eyes, take deep breath and let your body loose muscle by muscle 🙏.
:::
2. Answer those questions:
· What do you think about stress and its affect on your life?
· How do you rate your stress level?
· Do  you think of the stress that you experience as bad stress 👎or good stress 👍?
:::
3. Watch short Ted talk with Kelly McGonigal „How to make stress your friend” – so good! 😍
Next week: Improve your willpower by breathing :::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Be positive! · Health

Rest

How do you rest? ⚠️
Do you lie down on a couch in front of a TV? And when you do, do you relax, focus on a movie and let your problems aside? ☺ Or do you watch a movie but in reality you keep thinking what you haven’t done, what still needs to be done, you analyze your problems and in fact have no idea what’s going on in the movie? 👀
:::
You need to LEARN TO REST! That’s right, learn to rest 😉
When it’s relax time you need to focus on here & now and enjoy the silence/movie/chill. 🤗
:::
Learn to „lock” your problems in a cage and keep them there for later 🗝, now enjoy your time off.
If you’re having a problem dividing relax time and „worrying time” 😅 plan it 😉. Find a spot in your calendar where you can sit for 15-30min and think about your situation, about solutions for possible problems etc. Do it during this time and then have proper time off.
:::
When it’s relax time it relax time! Remember! Otherwise you’ll never rest and you’ll never feel relaxed ⚠️

Self-evolving · Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 16

I’ve got good news for you – willpower can be trained! 💪 It is often treated like something you either have or don’t but psychology researches show that you can train your strong will just like your muscles. And nobody was born with a 6-pack, right? 😉
:::
It is great news because those who aren’t scrupulous naturally can train it 💪. You’ve actually already started it with implementation intention (step 10) and by process visualisation (step 11) 😉
:::
Since willpower works like a muscle it has limited source of energy and strength. There are things that empower it 👍 but there are also things that weaken it 👎.
:::
Your goal is to get to know and, if possible, remove your obstacles to having strong will 😎. Those most basic ones are stress, tiredness and lack of sleep. It seems so simple, right? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Yet you do not always see the connection between those factors and your willpower.
:::
Task for today: Observe and write down (or analyze past experiences if you’re calm and rested today) how stress and tiredness have impact on your willpower:
* What situations are those?
* What happens then?
* How do you react?
* Is it harder for you to stick to your goal?
* Do you have any ways to help yourself and not to be tempted (turn your „I don’t want to” power on) or to do something that you don’t feel like doing (turn your „I want to” power)? Next week: Stress vs willpower (next week Smiley Future will be on Wednesday!)

:::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”