Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 46

Today’s the last step of our intense (and uneasy!) work on sabotaging thoughts 💪
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➡️Today’s task nr 1: Now appreciate yourself for all the hard work and congratulate yourself on your success 😎. Yes, success because just noticing the sabotaging thoughts is already a big part of the success! 😉
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I realize that working on sabotaging thoughts lasts longer than a week or a month. Those last couple steps were only a stimulus and en encouragement to work! 💪 So remember: everytime you notice a sabotaging thought appreciate yourself with a smile and a good word! 🙏 Same thing when you choose a helpful reaction instead of being tempted! 🤗
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If a sabotaging thought you ‘caught’ wasn’t pleasant, you got tense or upset, after recalling a helpful/supporting thought take couple deep breaths and relax your body 🧘🏼‍♀️
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➡️ And now task nr 2: Create a system of awarding yourself (daily, weekly, monthly) for your hard work on sabotaging thoughts 🏆. You deserve it! 🤗
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Write down some nice, supporting words to yourself appreciating your work 📝
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Next week: How emotions influence your willpower 🤔
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 42

Does it happen to you sometimes that you do something automatically and then you think why did it happen like that and you complain on lack of motivation and strong will? 🧐
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If yes, then next couple steps are for you as we will be working on catching automatic thoughts that sabotage your effort ⚠️
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Before every action (or resignation of acting) some thoughts appear 🤔. They often appear on a subconcious level so we might not notice them and that’s why we tend to think that they’re „stronger” than us 🤷🏼‍♀️.
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Today I encourage you to look deeper at thoughts that sabotage your effort 🧐. Try observing them while you’re fighting with some temptation or you feel like resigning from some important activity (e.g. workout). What do you notice? What happens then? 🤔 Write down what thoughts you observe 📝 and everytime, no matter how irrational or hard to accept they might be, congratulate yourself 👏! It is hard work on yourself so it is very important that you appreciate you for doing it! 🤗
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What are your thoughts that usually sabotage your goal?
Mine is usually: „I don’t feel like it”, „I’m too tired” or „I don’t know exactly how to do it” 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Next week: Know your sabotaging thoughts
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 28

How do you relax? 😉
Today’s last part of „Be good to yourself” series.
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Do you remember when we talked about factors that weaken your strong will? 🤔 It was stress and tiredness and lately we’ve been talking a lot about the danger of treating yourself badly and punishing (and getting into a trap of „everything or nothing” thinking” ⚠️).
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That’s why sometimes in order to rebuild and strengthen strong will you need rest, regeneration and pleasures that will give you energy and motivation to work 🤗.
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Task for today: Make a list of your ways of relax and pleasures. It is important so that they wouldn’t be contradictory to your goal (so e.g. don’t write on your list „eating huge pizza” or „eating chocolate cookies”  when your goal is to eat healthy 😉).
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It might be an evening with a good book 📖 or a movie 🎬, talk or meeting with a friend 💬, relaxing bath 🛀, walk around the neighbourhood 🏞, playing with dog 🐶, relaxing yoga session etc. 🧘🏼‍♀️
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So what are your ways to relax? Tell me! 😊

Next week: Sometimes it’s better to postpone
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 25

How did last excercise go? Did you manage to sincerely answer to the questions? 🤔 If you have you might’ve noticed that you can be too strict to yourself and today you’re gonna find out how to change it 🤗
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Remember last situation when you’ve made a mistake, a situation when you thought bad about yourself. Got it? What did you think of yourself then? What were you saying to yourself? 🤔
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Now imagine that you best friend, a relative, somebody close to you comes to you and tells you that she/he has had an identical situation and she/he is waiting for your reaction. What would you tell her/him? 😉
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Task for today: Compare what you say to yourself and what would you say to a person close to you in the same situatio 🤗

Next week: Learning without punishing yourself
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 24

Today I want you to think about your attitude towards making mistakes 🤔. Don’t deny it, we all make them 😉.
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The question is – what do you do next with them 🤷🏼‍♀️? Do you think of yourself too negatively, too strictly, blame yourself 😞? Or maybe you can look at your mistakes as inseparable element of being human, learning, risking and trying new things 🤗?
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Do you know how to treat your mistakes as valuable lesson, how to withdraw conclussion and move on? 😉
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You’re probably wondering what does an attitude towards making mistakes has to do with strongwill 🧠? If you’re too strict to yourself because of mistakes or failures you’ll easily get into „everything or nothing” thinking (I told you about it in step 15). And this leads to giving up and letting the rest of the plan go 😞
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Task for today is  to think about that and answer questions below:
* How do you treat your mistakes?
* What do you think of them?
* What do you feel then?

Write your answers down 📝

Next week: Be good to yourself
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 23

I strongly encourage you to constant observing 👀 what strengthens and what weakens your strongwill, training it and doing visualisations.
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In next steps you’re gonna look into a very important issue that I often see around me: excessive rigor and self-criticism 👇
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Do you know what I’m talking about? Does it apply to you? Do you focus on your mistakes, setbacks, defects and failures? Do you miss out on your advantages, achievements and successes? 🤔 When you do a  sum up at the end of a week/month/year what do focus on more? Failures 👎or successes👍?

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We all tend to notice negative and threatening affects of our lifes more. Our brain 🧠 works this way to catch potential danger as soon as possible and to prevent it.
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What’s more, if you’ve experienced rigor and excessive criticism at home or at school you might have a tendency of treating yourself same way 😟
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That’s why noticing positives is harder and requires more conscious effort.
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A task for today is to observe what do you concentrate on 📝
* Do you automatically focus attention on negative aspects? 🤔
* Does it apply to you or reality that surrounds you? 🤔
* What happens when you consciously try to redirect attention to what’s positive about you and what’s positive around you? 🤗
* Does anything change? 🤔
* How do you feel then? 🤔
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”


P.s. Today is Father’s Day in Poland so I’m posting this special photo of my Dad and me! 🤗

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 21

How’s your training willpower going? 💪 Any progress?
Today we’re gonna learn how to refill reserve of willpower.
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Think what is the source of your „I desire” power” – come back to where it all started so to your motivation 🤩. If you’ve been taking notes it would be helpful to look through notes you took during our first steps, especially when we’ve been setting goal using SMART method. Remember? We did that in step 6.
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Try to recall why is this goal important to you.
Those questions might help:
* What will you gain when you accomplish your current challenge? Will you reach your goal? Write down all benefits – those small ones and big ones, more and less obvious 😉
* Who else, apart from you, will gain when you succeed? Often our close ones are big motivation to us. Write down all benefits 🤗
Next week: Reward yourself!
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 20

As I have mentioned before, psychogists compare willpower to a muscle 💪 so they imply that we can train it and that it has its limits.
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Just like muscles our self-control can also get…tired 😪. And that’s the moment when we often think that we no longer have the power and give up 🤷🏼‍♀️
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I am sure you know this feeling – you e.g. do a squat or a plank, you are supposed to keep it for 30 seconds, muscles burn like crazy and it’s only 14, 15, 16 seconds… A thought appears in your mind „I won’t make it, I am tired, I am not strong enough!” 😫. You are facing a challenge then – either let it go and stop the excercise earlier or force yourself to check if you’re maybe stronger than you think..💪
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Willpower works exactly the same! Next time when you face such situation try to get through first feeling of tiredness. Don’t give up straight away, you might find out that despite that tiredness you still have plenty energy and more willpower that you’ve assumed. 😉
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Be careful – you can also overtrain your willpower. If you feel overwhelming tiredness that doesn’t go away don’t push yourself to exhaustion ⚠️. Get some rest, regenerate and then try again 😇.
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If you feel tired all the time you should think what’s the cause of that. Maybe stress, lack of sleep, Hypothyroidism? 🤔 Reasons of that can be plenty so if you often feel tired don’t ignore it ⚠️ Next week: Source of your „I desire” power
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 19

In previous step we’ve establilshed what can weaken your willpower, today we’re gonna talk how to empower it! 💪
Let’s try doing willpower training, shall we?
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How does it work if comparing willpower to a muscle is metaphorical? 🤔 The key to successful willpower training is noting, which you will do in a second, and chosing what’s harder for you. It is about creating a habit of stoping  to make right decision that brings you closer to your goal 😌.
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There are 3 ways to train your willpower. They refer to 3  powers: „I don’t want to”, „I desire” and automonitoring.
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Method 1: Improve your „I don’t want to” power. Chose one of your small bad habits that you’d like to change/eliminate like overusing some word, sitting wrong or anything else 😊
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Method 2: Improve your „I desire” power. Promise to yourself that you’ll start doing 1 thing a day that brings you closer to your goal (that you haven’t been doing before). It can be working out, drinking 1,5l of water a day, self-care ritual etc 😊
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Method 3: Improve automonitoring. Consciously observe something that you usually pay attention to and which is important to reach your goal, e.g. monitor what you eat (and what you snack between meals! 😉), what do you spend money on, how much time do you spend with your close ones etc. 😊
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It is important that you find small ways for practicing your self-control 🧠. Remember that willpower works like muscle and you can also overtrain it ⚠️. Don’t throw yourself in the deep end, start slowly, start small. 😉
Which method will you start with?
Next week: Willpower vs tiredness
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”
P.s. It is Mother’s Day today in Poland 😊💕 and I’m gonna see my Mom finally today after almost 4 months

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 18

Do you know that willpower is a part of our intincts? 🤔 Last week we talked about „fight or flight” response and today we’re gonna talk about „pause-and-plan response” – my favourite 😉
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This mechanism stops an arousal in our body (the one we feel e.g. when seeing a cake 🤤) and increases the amount of the energy that goes into your mind 🧠. Prefrontal cortex, a part of our brain that is responsible for controlling impulses and planning, starts to work harder 💪. It shares an information with other parts of the mind: Launching self-control! Thanks to it we can take deep breath, stop with a hand on a bag of chips, think and…put it down 😉
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Now the good news – not only is self-control a strong instinct like „fight or flight” reaction but you can actually help launching it! 😊 There is an easy, free and accessible for everybody way to do it – the key is to learn to breathe properly. That’s right, breathe. 💨
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In order to improve your willpower slow down the rhythm of your breathing, do 4-6 breaths in a minute 🙏. Try to make each one last 10-15 seconds. But don’t hold your breath (it will only make you feel stressed!) but slowly make each inhale and exhale longer. It is easier to start with prolonging your exhale first. Make sure to exhale all out, this way it is easier to take deep breath in.
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It requires practicing so don’t get mad when you don’t get that rhythm right away. The more you practice the better! 😉
Next week: Empowering your willpower :::
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”