Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 26

Do you ever punish yourself? For eating something that you shouldn’t have, skipping training, making mistake…? 🤔
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I know that this topic isn’t pleasant but if it does happen I highly encourage you to work on it 💪.
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Have a look how you find reaching your goal. Do you find it as a war – with yourself, external obstacles? 🤔 If yes then there’s risk that you’ll end up in an eternal fight with yourself and you’ll see every mistake as losing 😫. What comes next you might be even punishing yourself with bad words like „I am horrible”, strict refusing any small awards/pleasures or doing something as a punishment 😖
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So as strongwill wouldn’t break down and your desire/fighting for your goal would become a part of your everyday life, part of your lifestyle you need: patience, indulgence and will to act which doesn’t come with permament tension and fear of losing.
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Task for today: instead of treating realising your goal as a fight or „good” and „bad” actions try to look at it as a process of learning 🤓.
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You know those cute videos on YouTube of little kids learning how to walk? 😍 They fall down, get up and keep trying again and again – often with a smile on their faces! 🤗 Mistakes and slips are inseparable part of learning anything. And making new habits is nothing but learning.
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Try reformulating critical thoughts to a thought beneficial to learning. E.g. instead of telling yourself „I am lazy because I didn’t work out” it could be „I found out about myself that if I don’t work out in the morning I am too tired after work. I’ll rearrange my plan of a day.”
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Now write another examples down so you could use them in the future.
Critical thought:
Thought beneficial to learning:

Next week: Distinguish punishment from self-discipline

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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Motivation

What is success to you?

What is success to you? 🤔 What does being successful really mean? 🤔 Is it having lots of money? 💰 Being smart? 🧠 Looking good? 😎
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I’m gonna break something to you and you might feel bad but you need to be aware of that 😉: there’s always gonna be someone more beautiful 😎,  someone smarter 🧠 and, unless you’re Jeff Bezos, someone richer 💰. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be successful!
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Being successful isn’t being THE BEST. It’s being better than average. Being successul is being better than you were a month ago 💪. That’s a success!
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The best and the only scale you should be comparing your current self isn’t to other people because this might have the opposite effect, it’s comparing your current self to your past self! 😉
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As long as there’s progress there and a positive difference you’re successful! 😊
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This is healthy competition and both easiest and hardest to have! But if you’re progressing, if you’re going forward this is success!
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Do you agree?

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 13

This is our last step of preparations and after that you’ll be ready to start reaching your goal! 😊
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Now we need to focus on your surroundings and people around you. You are already well prepared so now it’s time to let your close ones know that there will be changes/that you’ll e.g. have less free time etc.
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While focusing on your resolutions and goals you could forget that it would be good to also get your close ones ready. Why?
* You have a chance to present them your plan and to explain why your goal is important to  you and ask them for support 🤝
* Once you’ll tell them about your resolution you’ll feel bigger pressure and it will be harder for you to let go once some obstacles come or you’ll have a bad day 😉
* While talking to your close ones you’ll see their reactions and you’ll know if  you can count on them and have their support or the opposite 😉
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Unfortunately it happens that family or friends react on someone’s will to change with resistance or even anger. There are plenty stories of girls who decided to drop couch potato life and and start working out, eating healthy and they heard „You better stop because you’ll be anorectic”, „Are you crazy?” etc. 🙄
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Usually it comes from people who know that they should change something about their lives too and because they don’t want to do it, it is easier for them to denny it, sabotage positive changes in person next to them etc. 🙄 If you get those kind of reactions look for support in somebody else like me and other members of Smiley Society! 🤗
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But I do hope that you’ll get positive comments only.
Next week: What is willpower and how does it work
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Next week:
Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

📸 pic taken in Greece in 2015

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 12

🧠SMILEY FUTURE🧠
— Step 12
Preparations to start reaching our goal are coming to an end – we start in 2 steps! If you have started earlier I hope that those prepation steps inspire you to possible changes and make your chance for success bigger 💪
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After last long and big step today there’s much simpler and quicker one 😉. Answer only one question: What do you need to reach your goal? 🤔
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Take a moment to write all of those stuff down – from most simple ones to those more complicated, for example: new leggins, prescribed diet, better time management, support from others.
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Maybe during creating your plan or during process visualisation you’ve already realised what you’re missing?
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Use this step to try and get those things, to organize or find a solution you need.
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If you don’t come up with any solution remember I can help! You’re not alone, use Smiley Society support 😘
Next week: Prepare your surroundings
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Source: @chodakowskaewa‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

📸 pic taken in 2016

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 10

🧠SMILEY FUTURE🧠
— Step 10
Implementation intention meaning how to implement your plan into life.
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Last week you created a plan of action based on your stenghts 💪 Today we’re gonna add your weakneses and obstacles that you may come upon to it. To make it all work you’re gonna need implementation intention but don’t worry, it’s a simple mechanism that is very effective!
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How does it work? Imagine  possible future scenarios that can be obstacles to reaching your goal and then find a solution for it. Later create (and write down!) a sentence: „If situation X happens, I’m gonna do Y” 😊
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Example: „If i’ll be eating out I’m gonna choose healthy and fit dish, for example a salad” 🥦. „If I won’t want to workout I’ll ask my close ones for support and cheering” 💪. „When I’ll be doing shopping I’ll go to a store with a prepared ‘to buy’ list” 🗒
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Creating  scenarios like this in your head is effective because it creates a connection between a situation/obstacle and your reaction to it. ⚠️ If a situation like this happens you won’t have to wonder what to do! You’ll work automatically because you’ve already excercised that scenario in your head 😉
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Making decisions (especially pushing temptations away 😅) requires a lot of energy from you and when you’re in a hurry or hungry you choose what’s easiest but not what’s best 🤔. You know what I’m talking about? Implementation intention is for those kind of situations!
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So let’s get to work! Try to think of as many situations in which you let go and lose your motivation. Find best reactions to them and write them down in „If situation X happens, I’m gonna do Y” scheme 😊
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Next week: Process visualisation

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

📸 pic taken in Malta in 2016

Smiley Future

Smiley Future – Step 7

You already summed up your last year, made a circle of life that showed you which part of life you should focus on and you set a SMART goal – specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and in time bound. Now it’s time to work on yourself and how to use both your strenghts AND weaknesses in achieving your goal 💪
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First of all say out loud what are your strenghts.
* What are you good at? 😁
* What comes easy for you? 🤔
* What are you effective at? 🙈 In what situations do you feel you have biggest impact on something, you feel your power? 💪
* Remind yourself of a difficult situation (at work, at home, some conflict or crisis) in which you did well. What skills, knowledge, experience helped you in it? 🤔
* What do your friends and family appreciate in you? 👍
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Now time for your external strenghts.
* On whose emotional support you can count? Who out of your family, close ones can and will give it to you? Who can you call in a moment of crisis, doubt? ☎️
* On whose support can you count? Who can give you good advice, some hints, answers when you need it? Who gives you honest feedback on how you’re doing? Apart from close ones this can be done in some Facebook groups, people trying to achieve same goal or fighting with similar difficulties. 💬
* What in your life situation will help you achieve this goal? Take your finances, moral support under consideration (e.g. friends/people who can help you create a nice CV, creat a well-balanced diet, create workout plan etc.) 🤔

Source: @chodakowskaeka‘s new book “90 days – design your tomorrow”

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Cherishing little things helps succeed

Do you cherish little things? Are you grateful for every small thing? I know I’ve already talked about it but it’s not only for being happier, it helps us with being successful too! 💪
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How?
When you learn to be happy about the little things you also learn to set smaller goals (because smaller goals will also make you happy due to lower expectations 😊). Once you set smaller goals it is easier for you to achieve them and it is easier for you to be consistent, to not give up hence to succeed 😎.
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For example, lets say you want to start a new business. Imagine that ideally you want to have 100 customers within 3 months but 3 months later you’re angry that it didn’t happen, you are frustrated with your dream and give up on the company 😡. Lower your expectations, be grateful for every single customer you get 🙏. Be happy about the 10th customer same way as you were happy about the 1st client you ever got.
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When you learn to do so it will be much easier for you to set yourself smaller goals and, believe me, it is way better to set smaller goals but more often than big goal that will only become a burden on your shoulders, you’ll be stressed and full of anxiety to fulfill it and basically unhappy 🤷🏼‍♀️.
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Do you understand what I mean?
I used to get panick attacks couple years ago. I was a wreck because I had enormous goals and this awfully big pressure (that I put on myself 🤦🏼‍♀️) to be big, to be someone. I wanted my book to be big, to be a bestseller, to have plenty people talk about it and out of 5000 that the publishing house printed only 600 got sold 💔.
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I was devastated but later on I kept thinking „wow, over half a thousand of people read my book!” 😳. Imagine a room with 600 people. It’s a lot of people!
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Of course in the end I still want to be big, I still want those big dreams to happen but instead of having 1 big dream and feeling stressed all the time I chose to change it into many small dreams (that in the end can become that one big dream when put together) and this way to be less stressed. I think it’s a healthy choise 😉
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Even physically it is easier to take couple small steps than do one big jump! 😉

About me · Be positive!

Failures

Many of you say that nobody is real on Instagram. That people tend to publish only photos from their happy momments and talk only about highlights from their lives.
This might be true but I am different. 😅
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I already showed you a picture of me looking unattractive some time ago (remember that all those instagram models pose in their finest clothes and perfect make up), I already talked to you about my bad days (cause we all have them!) and now I’m gonna talk to you about my last failures.🤪
Because we all fail from time to time and it’s OK!
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Failures are good because we get a great lesson and learn from mistakes but also we appreciate success more after couple obstacles! 🤗
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One of my latest failures was that I was supposed to lose 5kg in July. It was my goal and I started July with a diet and working out routine. But then i got busy and stressed (in the contrary to most people – when I’m stressed i EAT!). And…instead of losing weight I gained 1kg 😅 It might be a small failure but it still is a failure to me.
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Another one – I told you about a new project that I’ve been working on lately. I told you that I’ll tell you by the end of July if it worked or not. Well…it didn’t. I wanted to go back to University and start studying psychology but I didn’t get a scholarship and I can’t afford it. So no new University degree for me. At least not this year…
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And now biggest of my latest failures. As some of you know I published a book in February 📕. I’ve been writing it 1.5 year, looking for a publishing house next 3 years…Whole process lasted over 7 years and you know what…? I sold only about 400 copies… Out of 5500 copies we printed… Hardly no one buys it…It’s been heart-breaking for me as I really wanted this to work and this book to be read by plenty people but this happens I guess. It’s sad but it’s ok. I need to move on. It was still a big adventure and a dream coming true for me. I had plenty interviews and signing meetings so it was fun!
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So next time you fail remember to keep smilling! 😉 We all fail from time to time. The key is to learn your lesson and not to give up! 😊

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Stop & rest

Do you know when to stop & relax?
Are you setting yourself goals that you NEED TO do before taking some time off?
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You need to know when to stop.⚠️
There will always be something to do but you need to learn to put it aside undone and have some time for yourself. You won’t work well without rest anyway!
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It was hard for me, some time ago, to stop working and start chilling when I didn’t finish what I was doing. I kept going and going until it was done.
Today I set myself times when I start relax time and when it comes I just leave work and go rest. For example, I work till 9pm at my music agency or blog stuff (or doing chores at home or anything else) and whatever I manage to do till that time will be done and the rest I’ll do the next day. The world won’t end if I do the laundry the next day or send some emails the following morning. 🤷🏼‍♀️
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You need to proritise your relax time too. Don’t push it further and further. Just put work/chores/anything else aside and chill. You’ll get back to that tomorrow.
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BUT
It’s not only about small one-day activities. We keep setting new goals one after another after another. We succeeded in one thing, we got to our finish line and we want more and more and we keep pushing our finish line further and further instead of appreciating what we’ve achieved in the 1st place.🤷🏼‍♀️
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Don’t run forward. Stop and rest from time to time. Celebrate your successes, enjoy what you achieved, have some rest and then set new goals.😘 —
Last photo from Italy!
Swipe left for our short video from that trip 😊

Be positive! · Self-evolving

Leave your comfort zone

In order to grow your need to leave your comfort zone.
In order to achieve great things you need to leave your comfort zone.
In order to change your life you need to leave your comfort zone.

Success doesn’t happen by doing ordinary, easy things. You need to push yourself further to get what you want. You need to overcome your weaknesses to grow. 💪Think of it as going to the gym – you need to feel pain and feel uncomfortable for the workout to work. You don’t burn calories without losing your breath and you don’t build muscles without getting tired. This is this barier you need to overcome to get results. That barier is your comfort zone.💥

The same rule is when it comes to work, following dreams or anything else. You need to constantly leave your comfort zone. If something is too easy it means you’re doing something wrong. There NEED TO BE DIFFICULTIES. And you need to overcome them.📈

For example, if you want to be a successful businessman but you are shy, you don’t like talking to and meeting strangers – you need to overcome it.

If you ask musician or an actor if he/she is scared before going onto the stage most of them will tell you they are. No matter how many years they’ve been doing it. They overcome their stress, their anxiety and/or stagefreight every evening.🎙

There are plenty people who are stuck at work doing what they hate but they don’t look for a new job because they’ve been working there so many years that they can just keep doing it. The truth is they are stuck in their comfort zone. They are scared of changes, of new challenges, of meeting new people and starting from the beginning so they stay where they are. That is not right. You need to overcome this fear of changes, you need to overcome your weaknesses, you need to leave your comfort zone, go out and do what you want!

Everybody wants to be at home, in PJs not stressing about anything whole day. But this is not the way to achieve great things.

You need to grow to achieve success but you won’t grow without leaving comfort zone.